I am the last of my family, living alone and until recently, capable. Now I've developed autoimmune disease and am being treated by others as old and incompetent. Was scammed out of $60K several months ago and am having financial difficulty in every aspect. I need someone to talk with about "life's" problems and how to handle them. I need more than this org or that org. I need the care of helpers. One size does not fit all. I have many medical conditions to address. One neighbor tried to intervene in recent dispute with mattress retailer by acting like he was my son and I didn't know what I was talking about. He had no knowledge of issues he was inserting himself into. I finally called police. Is this what I have to look forward to? I am NOT demented. I see a therapist regularly for other problems and a doctor every 3 months. I need more than scheduled appts, although both are very good. In my 80s, high IQ, cognitive dysfunctioning and need help in food prep. I also have many allergies and reactions to foods, can only do microwave-ready. I need emotional support more than the every two week session with therapist. I need a "chat room" for elderly who are able. I need to recover the stolen money and the income tax refund would help. All my close friends have died, neighbors can help but they have their own lives to live. Can't ask for help too often or I fear it will drive them away.
I do have a hobby of researching family history with all 8 great grandparents and total at this point of 78,000+ individuals, but am fast slipping away from interest. I have depression due to the recent diagnosis and the holiday season is not helping. May be temp or more permanent. I have plans but all wishes for the future have gone out the window. My only friend of 45+ years is developing dementia/Alzheimer's and we aren't able to provide much "chit-chat" support to each other anymore. I need help, advice and insight. Thank you.
My friend was a "concierge" until she was in her 80s. She did things like pick up the mail at the post office and bring to a clients' home, feed their pets, drive their kids places, run errands, keep an eye on the house if they were away, make Christmas and Easter decorations for their homes, hire a handyman, hire a seamstress, write their letters and balance the checkbook. She would have done the sort of thing you need. Check with concierge services near you.
If you have the funds, you can hire a private chef to make and freeze microwave-ready meals for you. "Chef" sounds hoity-toity, but that's not necessarily the case, and they can cater to any food issues you might have. A cousin and his wife did that, and the woman would do all the grocery shopping, come to their house, cook up everything, package it and stick it in the freezer. She came every three weeks and made all their dinners with enough to have leftovers the next day. They handled their own breakfasts and had their regular groceries delivered by Instacart.
If that's beyond your budget, contact the local Meals on Wheels for your area and see if they can make meals that cater to your needs.
I am along with my husband fighting that.
He has Parkinson’s disease and no dementia whatsoever, yet, different professionals treat him like that,
that already happens several times and each time when people talk to me as if he is not present I start with very assertive statement, don’t ask me.
Independence and sense of autonomy and being recognized as whole person and maintaining dignity is taken away slowly. And if others don’t recognize importance of it then you have to start taking back that power. Assertiveness and self esteem is important and deserved at any age.
As for your financial problems, there is solutions.
Tax return you should appeal.
Look into different clubs, local groups to gain friends.
Some countries, like France, where joie de vivre is encouraged for seniors along with 3rd age university have better idea of what it means to be aging and how important it is to maintain and be involved in every aspect of life.
One thing I know, age does not matter I have friends aged 30+ to 80+, I don’t see why I need to keep with my age group.