I just don't want my siblings who abused me horribly for years to get any part of my estate. They are very wealthy and would easily be able to hire a lawyer to contest my will just to get the peanuts in my estate, which I plan to leave to charity and my ex spouse/friend.
Unless you're married or have a kid others (namely your siblings) will be able to lay claim to your money and property as your next of kin. Your will has to name each one of them. That way they won't be able to interfere with your wishes. You don't have to put in the part about them behaving abusively. You can but what's more important than that is making sure the lawyer you use is good at what he does, and makes that will air tight to keep your siblings out.
Tell your siblings exactly what you think of them while you're alive. This way you'll get some satisfaction from it that you won't get when you're dead. Then leave a letter with the lawyer telling them again. He'll read it to them at the reading of the will.
If you choose to do a final 'get even' with them, write each one a letter to be mailed upon death with copy of the letters in a sealed envelope - marked not to be opened unless siblings protest the will.
I would suggest that you focus on making your incapacity and estate planning as ironclad as possible:
- Who makes decisions regarding your medical and personal care? Name a backup and specifically exclude the siblings.
- POA for finances. Also name a backup. Add a trust institution or professional fiduciary as a final back up.
- Check your beneficiaries on retirement accounts etc.
- Notify your property manager in writing who has your spare key and is allowed to handle your affairs, care for your pets, retrieve your property ... again specifically exclude the siblings.
Recheck annually and provide fresh copies as needed.
Make changes now.
Pick an emotionally strong person who is dedicated to your wishes to serve as your executor. Don’t pick someone who will “cave.”
Wills are contested generally on the basis of fraud (by some beneficiary or executor), capacity of the testator (if you can’t think clearly, you are not generally allowed to change your will) and undue influence (by some beneficiary over you - to convince you to change your will).
Every state has slightly different laws, but only those people who would have received under your relevant state(s)’ laws (anywhere you hold assets counts) without a will, or under any of your previous wills) can sue in the first place. So don’t bother writing out irrelevant people.
Hire a competent lawyer. Hire a lawyer so young in a firm so solid that they will likely still be practicing and in business when you pass away. Make sure your will is easy to understand, even if you aren’t a lawyer. Drive yourself to the appointment. Pay for the appointment yourself. Give a sealed copy to your executor.
Tell people who are not involved about your decision to exclude. Give your executor a list of the names and contact numbers of these witnesses in a sealed envelope. Police officers, bankers, close, long-term friends who are disinterested parties —people who have credibility are good to include (no need to bother with wimps who don’t like to get involved).
Hire an independent filmmaker to video you explaining your will and keep a copy of that recording with your will. List all the reasons you want to exclude them. Your reasons don’t have to be nice or polite— you only need to be clear and competent. Again, make the appointment, drive yourself there, don’t invite your executor- make this independent.
I am an executor who successfully defended a will. The video and witness list would have helped a lot.
Leave the executor extra money to cover legal defense fees in case they are sued personally also! Laws that allow for these “double” parallel lawsuits (sue executor as executor and also personally) are becoming more common in the US.
Holding assets jointly is a good idea and does avoid taxes and probate, but the downside is the holder could wipe out the account or take over while you’re still alive.
Caveat: siblings can go to court and fight it no matter what you do; they can claim you weren't competent when you put the title in your property into joint tenancy, etc.........but prevailing would be much more difficult and expensive for them.
I am not a lawyer but have had personal experience with this.
Not a good idea.
Siblings, IMO, usually aren't considered in Wills. If there is no Will, in my State, it goes Spouse, children, grandchildren, siblings then parents.
Like said, make ur Will as ironclad as possible. Even if u put in because of the abuse at the hands of my siblings I am not leaving them or their children any part of my estate.
He was a local realtor and it soon became evident that he had finagled his way into the estates of other single elders.
They know why.
Don’t give them the satisfaction of hearing your disappointment after you are gone.
Think about the letter too. Do you really think it would make a difference to them? It may even bring them joy!
If you want to write a letter for therapeutic reasons, do so but consider not mailing it. Some people write their feelings down in a letter but do not mail it to the person.
Wishing you well. May you find peace.
Best of luck.
"An in terrorem clause is a clause in a will which asserts that if a devisee challenges the will, the devisee will not receive her devise. In effect, the in terrorem clause creates a conditional devise, given only if the will is not challenged. Often the purpose of the in terrorem clause is to stop any potential contestants of the will by offering them payment in the form of a devise."
From what I've read, the minimum devise can be $1.00.
In other words, a bequest can be made, but if the beneficiary challenges it, that bequest will NOT be granted.
Curious though, if your siblings are very wealthy and you're not, why would you think they would challenge your will?
And please find a qualified and experienced estate planning attorney to prepare the will. Some folks consider preparing their own will, or downloading something from online. This isn't the best way to go if you have concerns about relatives challenging the will.
Wish you good luck. If there is substantial money you are leaving when you pass it is best to hire a professional now to be certain that it is given exactly as you wish.
My mom actually has a 'bill' in hers for my YB and for me. Somehow we 'owe' the trust money for who knows what? It's not legal, being written on a piece of paper and not notarized.
My son, who is an attorney, calls this a posthumous FU. It's just hurtful. I am just glad I found it before mother dies.
My grandmother had in her will a statement saying "anyone who contests any contents of my will, will receive $1 and my eternal disdain." This was absolutely legal and written specifically for my aunt who is a real pill. And Aunt B knew it.
A good lawyer can express that in language that can be legal and binding and not breakable.