I am a live-in caregiver for my 95 year old father and my 76 year old sister who is suffering from cancer and effects of chemo. I rarely get to leave the house, so I have been using the internet excessively to somehow see and connect with the outside world. I stay up late online for hours when they are sleeping and get very little sleep. I have been clinically depressed for many years, and it seems to make me feel better for a short while. When things get bad here, the first thing I want to do is get online. I am definitely not at my best to take care of them, and I always feel hung over as if I had been drinking or something, but I just can't seem to avoid it. I do some design work online, and use it for necessary things like organizing appointments, bills, and supporting causes I care about, but one link leads to another. I was an addictions counselor years ago and I see some similarities between this and alcohol and drug addictions.
No Facebook, I just never wanted to have to keep up daily with something like that. I'm a private person and I don't want my whole life displayed on their pages. Hubby got it 5 years ago when he just about died from pneumonia. Lots of friends, family and coworkers wanted to wish him well or find out updates but had no way to do that. Being his c/g, I couldn't answer every email or phone call. When he got stronger he opened his account. He posts a few pictures of me on there (without my prior approval) and I go nuts. I only want the pictures that look good of me on there! Haha
I'm addicted to Amazon. It's so easy to shop from your computer and have it delivered right to your place. The bad part is that, when you go "dream surfing", the bill goes up! I would have never thought about those things had I not looked.
I get eye strain, which causes headaches, if I'm on the computer too long.
Caregiving is hard enough. Hang out on the computer (I-Pad, I-Phone, etc.) if you want to. Dear God, we've got to have SOME diversion.
I was able to get out a few hours 3 or 4 days a week.
Strange as it sounds I used one of those days to volunteer at the Hospice that was caring for my Husband.
This was a way for me to "pay back" the wonderful care he got as well as TALK to people and feel useful.
Also one day a month I went to a Support group that helped me in more ways than I can count.
So if you can get to a support group that will help you a lot.
If you are a member of a church ask if they have a volunteer that will come and give you a break once in a while.
And ...
Have you thought about Hospice for any of the family members that you are a care giver for?
With Hospice you will get a Nurse that will come in once a week, a CNA that will come in a few times a week. You also have a Chaplain and a Social Worker that can help you.
Hospice is not just the patient but it is the entire family.
You will get the supplies and equipment that you need to make the care giving job much easier.
The internet is wonderful but you should not shut out real people. I know as a caregiver the friends you had before fall by the wayside, the get tired of asking if you want to go to dinner to be met with..I can't I have to take care of....
Call a friend up and ask if they can come by for tea, coffee or just a chat.
I am sure while they are there they will ask if there is anything they can do...people want to help they just don't know what to do. Tell your friend, as a matter of fact I need a few things from the store, next time you are there could you pick up a bunch of bananas and a dozen eggs. I bet it will not be a problem and when they return you can have a sit down chat again.
Keep a list of little things that need to be done so when anyone asks you can pull a "to do list" page off and hand it to them.
"We"as a society don't like to ask for help but oddly we want to help. So do your friends a favor and give them little things to do.
Oh, and if you don't have a dog and can manage it get one. Just getting out 3 times a day to walk a dog will help you and I bet you will talk to at least 1 person each day doing that.
I can relate. It is hard being a full time caregiver. I know the day to day routine can overwhelm. It is only natural to look online an escape and to feel like you are doing something for yourself.
And especially since my father passed last year, I feel I am more addicted than before. I feel like there isn't a day that goes by where I don't get online. Try to find a better balance if you can. Try to get out the house even for a short walk might be helpful.
There are resources in the community and through church. You are certainly not alone in your thoughts and feelings.