Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Get her placed in a nursing home or an AL if she can afford it. If she lands in a hospital, especially rehab, tell them you can no longer care for her. That she needs to be placed. Allow the State to take over.
Was the doctor a Neurologist, if not, try to take her to a neurologist. He can run tests to determine if Mom has a Dementia.
There is no reason for you to continue to be abused by your parents. Get them out of your house as soon as possible. If they don't have resources, get them on medicaid and in to a nursing facility with medicaid beds. Then at least you can caregive from a distance making sure their needs are met.
If that's too much time have the state appoint guardians of your parents and have the state provide for them.
I'm not one to advocate dumping parents onto the state, however, I have had an eye-opening education on this site on the number of children/caregivers caring for the parents that abused them as children and continue to the current day.
I've found my formative years were a walk in the park when reading some of the posts here - and our family was definitely dysfunctional for sure.
I try to remember all the caregivers in my prayers - but especially for those of you who are abused and unappreciated. For your own mental and spiritual health learn to forgive your parents - forgiveness is for you and not your parents - forgiveness doesn't say that what your parents did in any way was OK. I will NOT say forgive and forget - I haven't figured how to forget - and maybe we're not meant to. What forgiveness does is to purge the poison of anger - don't be surprised if the anger doesn't magically disappear - I like to say forgive often - its a process. Also if needed seek counseling. Take care of you, you are worth taking care of. The best revenge is to live a healthy life of joy.
Well perhaps you weren't smart back then, but you can be smart now, by distancing yourself from those who abused you. Just because they are the people that brought you into this world, does not mean that you owe them one thing. The only person you owe anything to is yourself, and that is to live your best life, and not pass on the dysfunction that you had to endure. So get them out of your house ASAP,(if they're still there, as I'm a little confused by what you've written) and get them placed in the appropriate facility where they will have professionals care for them. And I can promise you, that your moms abuse won't fly with them. Don't waste any more time looking back, as we can only live our lives forward. Wishing you healing and peace, and mostly joy. God bless you.
According to your profile, "I am caring for Maria, who is 94 years old, living in my home with alzheimer's / dementia, arthritis, broken hip, hearing loss, incontinence, and mobility problems."
My question is, why is your parent(s) living in your home if you've been the subject of their 'belting' and belittling all of your life? Sounds like it's time for placement for them and a new life for YOU.
When I was a kid, I'd often ask for a beating from my mother b/c the emotional abuse would go on and on and ON forever, whereas a beating would be over and done with in X amount of time. I made it a point to move OUT of her home at a young age & make the decision to NEVER have my folks move in with me in their old age, or for me to move in with them. Once was more than enough.
I had been taking care of them at my house until 5 months ago. My daughter took a leave from teaching due to Covid, I was teaching online, helping with bills but she will eventually go back to teach Im August.
I feel the belting lasts for a period of time; the other lasts forever. It’s been a tough day-took mom to Dr for evaluation, hoping her behavior is due to Dementia, When the doctor said it’s not dementia; she’s just mean.., but just to you.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Was the doctor a Neurologist, if not, try to take her to a neurologist. He can run tests to determine if Mom has a Dementia.
If that's too much time have the state appoint guardians of your parents and have the state provide for them.
I'm not one to advocate dumping parents onto the state, however, I have had an eye-opening education on this site on the number of children/caregivers caring for the parents that abused them as children and continue to the current day.
I've found my formative years were a walk in the park when reading some of the posts here - and our family was definitely dysfunctional for sure.
I try to remember all the caregivers in my prayers - but especially for those of you who are abused and unappreciated. For your own mental and spiritual health learn to forgive your parents - forgiveness is for you and not your parents - forgiveness doesn't say that what your parents did in any way was OK. I will NOT say forgive and forget - I haven't figured how to forget - and maybe we're not meant to. What forgiveness does is to purge the poison of anger - don't be surprised if the anger doesn't magically disappear - I like to say forgive often - its a process. Also if needed seek counseling. Take care of you, you are worth taking care of. The best revenge is to live a healthy life of joy.
So get them out of your house ASAP,(if they're still there, as I'm a little confused by what you've written) and get them placed in the appropriate facility where they will have professionals care for them. And I can promise you, that your moms abuse won't fly with them.
Don't waste any more time looking back, as we can only live our lives forward. Wishing you healing and peace, and mostly joy. God bless you.
My question is, why is your parent(s) living in your home if you've been the subject of their 'belting' and belittling all of your life? Sounds like it's time for placement for them and a new life for YOU.
When I was a kid, I'd often ask for a beating from my mother b/c the emotional abuse would go on and on and ON forever, whereas a beating would be over and done with in X amount of time. I made it a point to move OUT of her home at a young age & make the decision to NEVER have my folks move in with me in their old age, or for me to move in with them. Once was more than enough.
How did you wind up in this predicament?
When the doctor said it’s not dementia; she’s just mean.., but just to you.