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Get her some painkillers if you can. See if there is a visiting nurse service in your area. Call her MD or oncologist, tell them the pain is increasing and ask how they can help. You are a good daughter by following her wishes.
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I'm not sure if Hospice is available in the country that is mentioned on your profile page. You could inquire and see. I think that I would attempt something to help mom with her pain, but, if she is mentally competent, I'd try to step back and respect her decision to not pursue more medical treatment. I can't see how you could force medical treatment. Why would that be an option? People have the right to make their own decisions about that. I don't find her wanting to have control over that matter as surprising at all. If you have trouble accepting her decline, which is very understandable, I'd try to find a counselor to discuss it with. It must be heartbreaking to know that she may not survive her condition. Take care.
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No hospice care here, plus the whole point is that she wants to be in her house, kind of ignoring the obvious. Like I said, I don't blame her, truly. I'm however trying to find out if there could be any pain relief approach without really finding out the cause, a pain clinic of some sort where I could find help without my mom having to go..it's crazy I know. I just would give anything not to see her suffering. She says she wants to die daily, I try to make jokes such as, "mom, but i just got here..Not so soon!" Or not to say anything and ignore the comment or just tell her I love her. Like I said, I just don't want to see her suffering so much.
And I know I need to find a way not to sink with her, I'll try to find some relief for the mind :) thank you!
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If your mom doesn't suffer from dementia and can still make decisions on her own then try to respect her decision to not seek out medical care at this time.

However, you said her conditions are getting worse and that she's in extreme pain. If she would go to the Dr. he might prescribe pain medication so she's not in so much pain. And if you get her to the Dr. you might ask the Dr. about hospice. Hospice is patient-centered, in the home, with no medical tests, no Dr. visits, no ER visits, and no medications (with the exception of pain and anxiety control).

Your mom doesn't have to be in pain. She can live out her life the way she wants to with no more Dr.'s and still stay at home and be free from pain.
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Is there hospice care where you live now? If she needs palliative (symptomatic, not curative relief), would that be an option?

Does your mom realize the can see a medical professional and refuse treatment? That is her right.

Get yourself some relief for your depression. And find things to do other than focus on mom's decline. It's her choice. It doesn't have to be yours!
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Is there hospice care where you live now? If she needs palliative (symptomatic, not curative relief), would that be an option?

Does your mom realize the can see a medical professional and refuse treatment? That is her right.

Get yourself some relief for your depression. And find things to do other than focus on mom's decline. It's her choice. It doesn't have to be yours!
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