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Having read a article on 'end of life rallying' would that be happening to our 99 yr old mum with dementia who last week slept 7 days deeply in bed (not her to do that) with hardly any food or drink? Friday evening BP shot up to 180/108..we expected it to drop?! Yesterday brother in law found her carers trying to keep up with her eating for England sat in her chair again as she was talking again and demanding! She is non mobile, sits in chair usually in her lounge in her own house from 6.45am - 8.30pm carers go in 6 x daily. Is alone at night as refused any CHC monies for paying for night care (refused when at a CHC meeting with local NHS group last Dec). Has been wanting to go to dad for at least 5 years now and no quality of life. It's very distressing for us as a family and a rollercoaster of emotions when all we pray is for mum to find peace at last. Thanks.

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Cally21: Imho, yes elders do sometimes have an EOL rally.
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Could be. If she hasn't been taking in food or fluids much in the last week, her organs will start shutting down soon. Enjoy the few moments she is more aware.
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If you want her to die at home, there is basically NO reason that she needs to leave. Get her on hospice so that she will not be presumed to be doing everything possible to survive. DNR? Living will? My goodness, she's 99. They should let her go in peace, even if she does catch something. Keep her comfortable.
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Could be. I guess only time will tell for sure. Certainly sounds like a rollercoaster!
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Cally21 Sep 2021
Thank you againx100 we appreciate your truthful reply. It certainly is like a rollercoaster! See my updated reply to JoAnne below! The stress is huge as she so wants to go, but is for some reason not 'letting go' yet. We lost our multi disabled younger son aged 9 in 1991 and she had been calling out his middle name the carers realised when asking for William, last week when we all thought she was dying. Has also been 'seeing' her mum & dad for a few weeks now have been told by my sister. We pray she won't catch the flu/covid and end of in hospital because all she has ever wanted like many, is to remain in her own home and thats what we have been helping her do for all these years Bless her. So very cruel..why can't she slip away like her mum did and wasn't found for 3 days, peaceful and having gone to sleep reading a book..but was only 74 and not 99 like mum is?!
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Yes, it could be. My daughter saw it all the time when working NHs. It could last a few days.
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Cally21 Sep 2021
Thank you JoAnne your reply is a comfort and like many on here is truthful.
Mum is sitting in her chair today and has eaten some porridge as though nothing had happened last week! Can't move, is very confused,, and will now be sat there until 8pm tonight with her lovely carers going in regularly. We remember my MIL did the same but was in hospital at the end. Were called and drove 7 hours thinking on end of life...to find her sat up and chatting happily. Next 3 days she had lots of visitors and almost a party atmosphere bless her, before she slipped away in early hours of 4th day, so praying for mum to have that too now.
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