I don't want to give details, I just get reamed for expressing annoyance overmuch. Suffice it to say, the last 3 days I have sat with mom for over 15 minutes and that is when the 'insanity' starts. Says things that ultimately don't make sense, doesn't understand answers, etc. Gets to the point I just leave because I can't take it anymore, she won't drop it, and I will not hang around trying to 'fix' it. I think things go better if I stay less than 15, 10 minutes. Is it possible to stay too long? I know her brain is not working too well anymore, Some ways she is still sharp, but other areas she is as dense as the proverbial log. I've noticed that when I answer she seems to have a blank expression, and nothing I say seems to register as she will simply go on and ignore what I've said, even when it answers the question, and repeats it. I'm thinking of testing the hypothesis out and see if longer/short periods make a difference in how she acts. Anyone out there similar experiences?
I have a friend who's doctor told her to stop visiting her mom, who had dementia and was in a nursing home, everyday. He said it was not healthy for her. She cut it back to 3 days a week.
I find when I bring them, there are long silences, mom just sits there looking blank. I just don't think there is much to talk about, but at least they do come occasionally. I have no. one. else. I am there almost every day.
There is the possibility that she'll end up back home as she is still 'medicaid pending', and I am waiting for that cement shoe to drop. I may end up with an astronomical bill and mom home complete with all the problems with her memory, what she wants and unable to express it, etc.
Your suggestion of just leaving seems to work the best. Mom always looks pouty but seems to have forgotten things by the following day. It is simply that I am now '3 for 3', 3 days in a row there has been a problem. I will try just staying shorter period of time see how that works. Thanks.
The perception or an obligation to be cordial, friendly, cheery or whatever can become a real drain. The patient may just want the visitor to leave so he/she can rest or sleep.