She is 88 and was very active until last October when she came to visit and never left. She did not have any hobbies but spent her time exercising 5 days a week, attending church and was a part of the senior group. She was always praying for someone and had a list of people she called every week.
Since coming here (Florida from Georgia) most of the time she refuses to talk to people who call her and she very seldom calls them.
She was always such a positive person. Now she only sees doom in everything.
Everyday she ask me about every 30 to 40 minutes what are we going to do.
If I tell her several things she can do, she will determine she can't do it.
Unfortunately, I don't know any activities to occupy her time. She does not have any hobbies. I think people were her hobby. She will wash sometimes but as soon as its over...What are we going to do now is always the next question?
My mom does not have any health issues at 88 years old. She takes a very low dose of blood pressure medicine. When she came she could out walk me but now she refuses to exercise. She still has a strong walk and moves around very very well. You would never think she was 88. Her memory is outstanding. She keep up with my schedule better than I do. You tell her something and she will not forget. She keep up with the news also. She was keeping up with all her finances until a few months ago when she decided she did not want to think about them anymore. My sister handles that for her but every once in a while she will remind me of a bill she want my sister to pay attention to.
I have a brother who is in Florida and is with my mom when I am not. My other siblings live in different states.
Any suggestions will be helpful. Oh, she refuses to join the senior group at the church I attend. They do zoom meetings.
I’d also keep in mind that sometimes the early signs of dementia are not memory loss. Sometimes, it’s poor judgment, depression, withdrawal, loss of interests, etc. My LO ran her own household, including, shopping and paying bills, right up to the point that dementia became quite pronounced. Within several months, she went from managing her household to needing AL. For a year beforehand, she had stopped going to family gatherings, which she previously loved to attend. Whenever, I invited her to events, she decline making up excuses that I knew were untrue. In retrospect, I think she felt confused and unsure of herself and that’s why social events and going in public made her scared she’d get embarrassed.
You might ask her if she would be willing to help you out with something. And provide her to do something.....make face masks, write notes to seniors who are isolated in nursing homes, organize old photos, do jigsaw puzzles, set up and care for a fish aquarium, Foster a cat, etc. She may just be tired and to take it easy. I’d let her do what makes her happy.
As far as being her entertainment committee goes, why does she feel that it's your responsibility to be that for her? Maybe it's time to look into independent living for her where she can hang out with people her own age again. If she doesn't want to move a muscle and do anything, then why ask you what's 'to do' next? Nothing mother, you don't WANT to do anything! Right? I mean, realistically speaking!
Wishing you the best of luck!