My FIL is recovering from a serious illness and staying with another relative right now. I am picking up his laundry once a week to help out. The first week I was shocked at the amount of laundry he had, but thought perhaps he had some left over from his stay in a nursing home (even though I was doing his laundry during that time too and actually felt bad that I might have missed some). This week I was beyond shocked. In one week, he had 3 pair of slacks, two pair of jeans, four sweat suits, 10 tee shirts, 5 pair of pajamas, two more pajama pants, 3 long sleeve knit shirts, 5 sweaters, a jacket, 10 pair of socks and 3 handkerchiefs. That is more laundry than my husband and I have combined in a week. Does anyone else see this happening to their elder? I haven't tried to approach him about this yet because I'm not sure what to say. His 'dirty' clothes still smell fresh and clean like they did when I washed them the last time, so hygiene isn't a problem. Thoughts? Is this simply quirky? Is he just a clean fiend? I have no idea, but I've never seen anything like it.
It could be either the relative or FIL who is at the root of it all. You might want to ask (carefully) about all the laundry to see if you can discover why there is so much and whether there is something they can do on their end to minimize it.
I might chat more with the person that he is staying with and just see if they comment on him changing his clothes a lot. I wonder if he may have trouble hanging things up or folding and even if something isn't dirty, he just tosses it in the dirty bin, since that's easier than hanging it back up or folding.
He had pneumonia and was in the hospital then in a skilled care facility for two weeks, so no stroke. He does have some minor short term memory issues, but nothing that would lead to him wearing this enormous amount of clothing.
I am going to ask the relative if they notice him changing clothes 2 or 3 times a day. It may be he has always been like this, and won't wear anything after it's been on his body even if it's for 30 minutes. Even though I am primarily the one taking him to appointments, to the store, shopping, pharmacy etc., I don't live with him so that's why I am perplexed.
I know there could be FAR worse problems so I am grateful that this little oddity is all that is going on with him right now. In years gone by he has been very difficult and even aggressive at times, but he seems to have mellowed in the last couple of years and for that I am EXTREMELY grateful.
It could be in the nursing home, the patients clothes are put in the hamper after wearing them for one day. I was always surprised at the amount of laundry my Mom had, but I had noticed she was wearing her breakfast, lunch, and dinner, so that made sense.
I, for one, would have GRATEFUL had my FIL changed once a week! I would have to beg, threaten and finally just "lose it" to get him to understand that he HAD to shower 3 x's a week and while he was in there I'd take all his clothes and throw them in the washer. He was divorced and never handled the "laundry" stuff well. When he was "ok" it was bad by day 3 or 4, when he became bowel incontinent, and still wouldn't change out of his "thong" underwear after an accident....I had to bring it up with the dr.
Overcleanliness is not something we see a lot of on these boards. Maybe just be grateful and know it could be 100xs worse!
Just an oddity--for sure. Be grateful that's all you're dealing with!
I am so glad that he has mellowed!
My SIL says he gets up and puts on a clean sweatsuit, then after breakfast he takes a shower and puts on slacks or jeans. So he puts everything in the dirty laundry as soon as he wears it, even if it's for 20 minutes. No wonder some of his clothes are so worn out and faded so soon after he buys them! He also wants everything washed in hot water, which I just nod and smile and then wash the way the labeling indicates.
Thanks to everyone who provided constructive advise!
Often she'll call to say she's out of underwear and we go there to find the underwear in her drawer as it should be. Sometimes the underwear is stuffed into a couple of other drawers so the underwear drawer is empty.
What do you make of that?
Often she'll call to say she's out of underwear and we go there to find the underwear in her drawer as it should be. Sometimes the underwear is stuffed into a. Iuoke of other drawers so the underwear drawer is empty.
What do you make of that?
From what you posted about the way he set up his closet and how he refolds his clothes it sounds as though he is picky about his personal clothing. That is better than the folks who wear the same thing for days on end. Maybe the relative he is living with can help a bit by letting you know about what he only wore for a few hours. It is a game - play it well.
Your FIL sounds like he's got a similar personality and I suspect the reasons for the excess laundry are the same.
People who say you shouldn't complain about it haven't been through it. The only thing I could do was re- hang and fold obviously clean clothes, and I suspect that's your only option as well.