I live 800 miles away. I am an only child and My mother has vascular dementia and I am her POA. She was transferred from the hospital after she had become emaciated and fallen to a memory care facility. Then she had a heart attack and was transferred again from the hospital to a Skilled Nursing Facility. She is rehabed from the heart attack and can go back into a Nursing Home facilty and I hired a non emergency transfer service(cost a fortune) to transfer her from the SNF to a really nice Personal Care facility about 7 miles from my house, as my family is exhausted and financially strapped driving over 800 miles to where she is every other week, which is the most often I can humanly go to oversee her care and her home etc. It took over a month to set this up with each facility (departing and entering facility) and all was supposed to take place this AM. Well the Director of the facility met the transport people at the door and would not even let them in, and my mother came up and was agitated and refused to get on the bus. The Director said the ambulance people would be kidnapping her if they took her. He said this in front of my mother. She became extremely angry and is screaming she is getting a lawyer, that we can not do this to her. We are trying to do what is best for her. We simply can not move to NM. My husband has a good job he has been with for 23 years in South east Tx. and we can not be there in NM to watch over her care. The psychiatrist diagnosed her with vascular dementia.Her cardiologist knows she has dementia, anyone who talks to her for more than five minutes should have no doubt. Her short term memory is basically gone. She is incontinent and will not eat without being in a care facilty. This facility is making a good bunch of money from medicare right now and eventually from her assets which are numerous.We have been looking for an elder attorney in her area and there is not one. How do I find out what the laws are. We do not want to be charged with kidnapping, but we NEED her here for her own safety and care. Going to Court to get guardianship is an option, but it is not guarateed it would be us that would be the guardian and it takes forever and in NM elder laws are on the elders side, which is good but she doesnt want to come here.