Where to place mom who needs high level of care, (toilet ing,showering,dressing,cannot walk alone) but mind is intact. Mom needs assistance with dressing,shower,is urinary incontinent,cannot walk alone,but get mind is still sharp. All board and care homes have people whose minds are compromised, moms mind is good. Can't find appropriate living situation for her that provides high level of physical care with other residents who have minds still intact.
Yet most care facilities have a majority of people who aren't sharp mentally. This makes it hard for the person with good cognitive skills but poor physical health to find a good place. You'll find nursing homes with people who are in their 50s and are there because of MS and other diseases. They struggle with the same issue. If you are lucky, you may find a home with a few people who are cognitively sharp.
You have to do what must be done, so get her the physical care that she needs. Then keep her supplied with social and mental simulation and work with the social worker to make good things happen.
Take care,
Carol
To this day, I struggle to understand how he maintained a good disposition. If I was in his position, I would have begged to "end it all." He was completely dependent on staff, family for ALL of his needs. Again, his sharp and excellent mind was trapped in a body that no longer functioned. It would have been the ultimate torment for me. I admired his courage and strength. He was a stellar example of making the most of a horrible situation. He was my hero.
That said, try to find the best facility for your Mom's needs. One that has an active "activities" program to keep her engaged. Yes, there are facilities will elderly and middle-aged people mingled. I would consult an elder care manager, a geriatric psychiatrist/psychologist, caregiver support groups. Elders in your Mom's situation can become easily depressed with thoughts of their situation which can spiral out of control and cause even more complications.
You mention board and care homes so I'm assuming you do not live in the United States. Therefore, it's hard to give advice when most of us are answering from our knowledge of care in the United States. Do you have a gov't entity in your country that deals with the aging population? Start there.
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