Yesterday I blindly went to see mom. I asked how she was and her response was “they’ll tell you!” Soon after her aide came over and said there was an incident last night. Turns out mom made a sexual advance toward a male resident. Also, when they were giving out meds she made a big deal as to how one of the aides (that she doesn’t care for) administered her eye drops. She dropped the F-bomb. The next morning she looked outside and asked where her car was (she’s never driven a day in her life, she’s legally blind). Apparently it took quite a bit to settle her down from the eye drop incident. Mom has never used foul language or talked about sex EVER. The Residential Care Center owner talked with me quite a bit about adjusting meds, what may be coming next and also what the plan is if she got to the point of not being able to settle down. This would require them to call the EMTs on a 503(?) meaning that if they remove her she would not be able to come back to the center. Has this happened to anyone’s LO? Where do they go from here? This center is a step up facility (assisted through hospice) and I was hoping this was her last stop. A UTI has been ruled out. She does not have a formal diagnosis. Her “new patient”neurology appointment was canceled several times due to C).
I'm so sorry for your situation, must be very hard 😥
Caregivers with experience will be able to handle the new symptoms though, a few swear words won't shock many. Advances if just words can be delt with easily. But if there are physical behaviours or your Mother is very distressed they may need the Doctor to review her.
I live in a COVID hotbed, and the psychiatric services at my LO’s facility had been postponed for long periods during the worst of the pandemic, but are now once again active.
If you are able to get a recommendation for a specialist from the facility where your mother currently resides you will be able to work WITH the facility, and that’s your best bet.
Contact the facility social services provider (the administrator in your mother’s case?) and as whom they’d recommend.
Her current change in behavior is not unexpected in the presence of dementia but CAN be worked with if you can convince Ce her present facility that you are willing to actively seek help for her.
VERY DIFFICULT for YOU (it was for me), but you’ll feel better tooonce you know more precisely why she’s acting as she is, and developing steps to manage her behavior and conduct. Good Luck!