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I Live in South Carolina. Mother in nursing facility in Los Angeles with Advanced stage four cancer. She has No will. I am not listed as a beneficiary and obtaining a POA not possible due to Covid 19 and no Notary may not go into the facility. Her apartment manager wants her belongings gone by the end of the month and I do not have the resources to do so. I have a job, home and animals to take care of and live alone. No siblings. So here I sit.

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Wow, that's not an easy situation. Is there any other family? Or friends? Who was Mom's close contacts in LA before she had to go into hospice? I'm wondering if there are a group of people Mom was close to there who can go to the apartment to help.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
She was a loner, even with myself. Very independent and to proud to ask for any assistance. I never even knew she was sick. Unfortunately her choices created this said situation. The landlord will take over and she can keep any monies she acquires from her belongings to cover the cleaning fee etc. Her rent is up end of June and she is also apparently two months behind since she stopped working this March due to the virus and was unable to walk to get to the bank, etc, due to her health. (she's 80) I've yet to hear back regarding what she is planning to do with these items, but at this point what does it matter, I have no say since there is no POA and Mother is still living and lucid. Thank you.
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Can you ask the social worker at the facility for advice? I doubt the landlord is going to be asking for a POA if someone shows up to clear the apartment for them. I think, according to the law, the landlord needs to inventory the items and safely store them for a period of time. I'm sure they would rather someone come and get them.

I like mrbills suggestion of having one of your mom's friends look through the belongings if there is anything you want to save. Other than that, let the landlord handle it. What else can you do?

I'm sorry you're going through this.
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Since you are not legally responsible for her then I can't see how it is your problem. I there anyone local who could retrieve any small valuables or sentimental items? Beyond that I rather doubt that anyone who has been living in a facility has very much of value, either tell the facility to deal with it or hire a junk removal service.
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Have you spoken with the landlord and explained your situation? I would try that to bide time, maybe 2 weeks or a month.

This IS a tough one.

I believe the landlord is within his rights to ask the apartment be vacated. If the rent for the month has gone unpaid (has it? And for how long?) what else can they do? No altruism exists at a rental/mgmt company.

Senior living is at a premium these days. What if someone is on the waiting list for that apartment and has been waiting for a long time? It’s only fair to vacate your mom’s possessions as soon as you can so another person in need can have it. If it is unclaimed they landlord can put the items at the curb for you or whoever to go through, then have it hauled away.
Does your mother have a security deposit there? If so landlord will most likely have her forfeit that and he will use that $ to clean out the apt and throw the stuff out.

If you as her daughter can’t get there nor afford it your hands are tied. Sorry as this must be very sad for you.

Packing up items and shipping cost a lot of $. The landlord isn’t going to fund that. So if you can’t afford it, try to make one trip there now to retrieve any momentos you may want to keep and then shut the door and let it go.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply and compassion. Every little bit helps.
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Is there a church or other organization where people know your mother? Could they get a work party together to move her stuff out? Can you afford to get it stored or shipped ? If she didn't have this type of group try contacting Catholic Community Services or similar organizations there for help.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
I looked into EVERY possibility to retrieve her belonging and the cost and time involved does not outweigh the few possessions she has left. I makes me very sad.
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We recently moved mthr's things out in an area with rampant COVID. The care home would not allow us to come in. I asked for photos and postcards to be saved, and I later picked up that box outside the facility. Her easy chairs, bookshelves, and other furnishings were distributed to staff who might want them, residents, or donated or trashed. There just was not much worth keeping. You can let it go and it will be ok.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
I feel like I have to detach myself from her belongings so I can deal with not being able to separate her personal items from those that will end up being donated or sold by the apartment landlord. She worked very hard for all these things but in the end she will never ware those clothes again, read those books, listen to beautiful music, etc (she can barely walk, not to mention dress herself, she went from a vibrant woman to a hunched over potato bug (stage four cancer, and I never knew it). Her personal treasures a few, but it still hurts. I sometimes feel I have to imagine that the apartment burnt down and there is nothing left so that I don't feel guilty about not hording her belonging that she will never see again regardless. Thank you for your feed back. As you said "I can let go, and it will be okay".
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try, I see her apt is in LA, CA. I wish I were closer to help out.
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If her rent is being paid he should not be able to remove her belongings.
If you pay her rent for a few months that might give you time to get there to clear out her items. Might be something you can work out with the landlord as to timing
OR
Completely separate yourself from her belongings and let the landlord do what he want with them.
Do you suspect that there are any items of value? If so...
Hire a moving company to go in pack up everything and transport it to you, or to a storage unit so you can go through the items.
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Shane1124 Jun 2020
Great idea grandma!
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As a notary in NC, they have changed the laws for notaries in some places because of Covid. I can now "watch" someone sign something via Facetime or Zoom and can noterize it when they send it to me in the mail. So more than likely, you can get the POA if you and your mom feel that is nessesary to help her.
And you are right, her belongings are just things, unless you have someone (perhaps a church member?) that you can ask to help pick up the items that have any special meaning to them (family heirlooms or such), then just let them go, they are just things. I'm sorry that you are having to deal with this in such a crazy time and from so far away.
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Judysai422 Jun 2020
ALos, most LTC facilities have someone on staff who is a notary. Ask them.
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Here in my town they have stopped all evictions because of the COVID-19 virus. Look into that in LA, it might buy you some extra time.
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mterpin Jun 2020
Yes - I would look into that as well. I don't think they can evict anyone right now. What part of Los Angeles is your mothers apartment in? It would make a difference. Some parts are not in the incorporated area of L.A. Here is the link to the site. It looks like unless they extend, the last date is June 30th, for the moratorium. But it may be extended. https://dcba.lacounty.gov/noevictions/

Also, don't worry about the POA. I don't have one for either parent, and everything has worked out just fine. When the time came for my Dad, I had to sign the DNR myself, and not one person asked me for any legal documents.

As a side note, I just went to Los Angeles to clean out my parents home.
I had thought that I would wait until my mother passed away, but Covid presented a unique opportunity to do stuff like this on your own, and I really don't believe that my Mom will ever go back to the house. The house was about 3000 sq ft, and I ended up tossing almost everything with the exception of photos. We filled up two large dumpsters with 12 tons of stuff. In an odd way it was cathartic to do so much tossing. Every toss felt like a large weight off my shoulders.
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Does you mom have any friends in that area? Maybe a few can go to retrieve personal momentos and valuable items. You can contact one of those folks that will buy everything else in the home and they will take it away.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
No friends, no family...it's just me.
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I went through something very similar to your situation a few years ago.
I traveled across the country to pack up the apartment of an elderly relative with dementia. One of my cousins wanted me to bring EVERYTHING back. If I'd listened to my own better judgment, I would have donated almost everything and left it there! It was hauled back in a POD and put into storage. After she passed, it was all disposed of. The only things her siblings really valued were the old family photos.

Speak to a Social Services director or some other administrative type person there at the facility where your mom is and see if they can recommend someone who handles elder relocation services such as what is needed. Is/was she a member of a church there? When I packed up my aunt's apartment, she and her husband had been longtime members of a church of which they had been very active. The church had a ministry that did the very thing you have described (packing up elderly people's homes). This group came and helped me and I could NEVER have done it without them!

Perhaps you could located a church near her apartment which has that type of ministry and have them take care of it, with a special request they save and ship to you any photos or jewelry items.

There HAS to be some type of group that goes and does that sort of thing.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply. After weighing out the situation, I realized I would only end up storing her belongings and then what? I do not have the time to run around and try to sell the few valuable items that she owns. I decided to keep the memories and let the landlord compensate for any expenses accrued for having the items donated, sold, etc.
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If there are things in the apartment that you want, have a friend or relative retrieve them. Then, notify the landlord that your mother has “moved.” The landlord will, rightfully, keep the security deposit because the apartment wasn’t turned over empty, but you’ll be done with it with very little trouble.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
No friends and no family....My mother had made these choices. She is a very private person so I am the only one left to "deal".
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I am so sorry that you are losing your mom and can not be with her at this time.

May God give you strength and peace during this difficult time.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply and compassion...
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Is she in a hospice or an apartment? I've never heard of anyone being kicked out of a hospice, but I would contact the local Area Agency on Aging and see what resources are available to you both.
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worriedinCali Jun 2020
She’s not being kicked of hospice. The OP is clear-her mother has gone to nursing home & entered hospice. Her senior apartment where she was previously living must be vacated. She’s not being kicked out of anywhere.
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I would ask the landloard for suggestions. Be emphathetic to his/her situation also.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
I have been VERY empathetic to the landlord. I even offer her some of the very valuable items that my mother has in compensation for me not being able to afford to store or get or ship her belongings...
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I'm sorry for your problem! Is a tough one. All the more reason for your mom to have given you POA etc. long before now...She put you into this situation so there's not much you can do except possibly find one of her neighbors or a friend to take care of things or get the rent caught up to date to buy you time. Can you find a friend or neighbor to watch over your dog while you maybe take a long weekend and come out to take care of things? If there is no way you can afford to do so, I am at loss for suggestions except to suggest that you have a poa in place so you don't do this to anyone else. Is not fair to you What is happening. Good luck!!!
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Are you able to pay for movers and put her things in a storage unit? May be the only solution now. You can be appointed her guardian especially if she can give verbal consent over the phone. Good luck with this very difficult situation.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Well, she wont even speak to me anymore when I call to say "Hello"...she is a hard headed woman and from the old country...
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I’m so sorry you and your mother are suffering and now the landlord just added one more thing to the pile. It’s so overwhelming and you feel you’re going to crack at any moment, my heart goes out to you.
First if all any changes, notices etc with the landlord must be in writing, it’s the law. My sister & I live in California and she runs a property management & knows the laws. He cannot just call you and say he wants your mother out by the end of the month. He must give written notice whether it’s a 3 day notice to pay or quit because rent is behind or a notice to evict and I believe it’s now a 60 day notice to evict. He must post the notice at the residence and mail a certified copy. If I were you I would place an address change with the post office so her mail is forwarded to you. If it comes down to him cleaning out her apartment, if anything is valued at more than $250 he must store it. Remember unless you have signed paperwork you are not financially responsible for her debts. What I have learned is that the memories are in my head and although I would like to keep all of my moms things it’s just stuff. This is a very emotional and overwhelming time for you, please take care of yourself first.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply it was a huge emotional help. Your right it's the memories that I need to store not her "things"....
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See what you can work out with the landlord. Talk to the Office on Aging in your county. Also, and this works, contact your senators and representatives for the state in which you live. I assure you - these people can and do help. I have seen it happen many times. I am so sorry and send prayers for you.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply and compassion.
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The landlord can remove stuff after no action from eviction notice. It is tough to be so far removed and can not do anything. Because there are no assests you do not have to hire a probate attorney. I would call The Public Guardian office. They will advise you regarding your involvement in your mothers "dependent needs". If you have power of attorney (someone has to be for the facility care) then the Public Guardian would not be involved. It sounds like you are free to let the landlord dispose of her houshold stuff for some compensation for unpaid rent. It sounds like you do not have the resourses(unless there is a burial trust) to do anything when she passes. The County has a plan and they will take care of her remains. The facility will notify social security to stop payment if you have that in her "last wishes file".
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply. I don't have POA thanks to the rehab facility. They will not allow her to sign anything financial without a notary and they are not allowing them to enter the building during this time. Landlord says she never paid the first and last months rent according to the lease, but she has been living there for years and years.....sounds fishy. I am currently still paying off my fathers funeral expenses from 4 years ago....
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Does your mom have friends or relatives in LA who can go into the apt and search for things of value that might be needed. Like paper work or even cash, jewelry stashed?

Is there anyway for you to go for a day or so just to search for these things yourself - and have someone in SC look after your pets for a brief period? You could call ahead and ask a local charity to meet you to load up everything and remove it and you would have the important documents. If you really wanted to go, I'm sure there is someone you know where you live who would do pet care for a couple of days. And, I just can't imagine a facility not having someone on staff who can notarize something for you/your mom.

If you donate and don't clean the apt, so what. Mom just won't get a deposit back. You won't spend time cleaning and can go back home.

When she does pass, even if no will, if there is anything left in her name, you would be the beneficiary and so determined in probate court.

If going there is just not going to happen for you, then tell the apartment manager it's not your problem. They can contact your mom. Apt manager will know appropriate way to dispose of property left in an apartment when rent no longer being paid.
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worriedinCali Jun 2020
It will be hard to find a charity in California that will come out to the apartment. They are just now being allowed to return to work. There is also a long list of items the ya rent accepting for donations right now too.
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First, check your state's landlord tenant law. In my state, the landlord MUST store belongings for a period of time before giving them away. The only exception is foodstuff that won't keep. Also, check with the top dog at the nursing facility so you are able to get the durable POA (with notary). Perhaps someone at the facility has a license to be a notary? Surely they have other similar crises they handle.
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worriedinCali Jun 2020
A nursing home employee CANNOT legally provide notary services for a resident of the facility. It is not allowed in California where the OPs mother resides. The OP cannot get a POA because no facility in this state is allowing outsiders to come in.
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In California the landlord only has to store personal belongings for up to 18 days. 15 days if they notify you in person, 18 days if they notify you by mail.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you, all your post a very helpful ! xox
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Did he/she send you a written notice?
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Prayer sent to you.
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This is in addition to my other answer. I don't believe that her landlord can just go into your moms apartment an dispose of her belongings. It seems to me that there would have to be an eviction hearing. And the vast majority of the courts are closed right now. I was just reading the link from Santa Monica... and the period is 12 months there

"2.A temporary moratorium on eviction for nonpayment of rent by residential and commercial tenants impacted by the COVID-19 crisis is imposed as follows:a.No landlord shall endeavor to evict a residential or commercial tenant for nonpayment of rent due to financial impacts related to COVID-19, until twelve months after the expiration of this Order. "

There's also something about major health issues a well. Here's the link again..
https://dcba.lacounty.gov/noevictions/
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worriedinCali Jun 2020
Actually California is reopening courts across the state. Most are open. In Los Angeles county, the clerks office is open for filings. Courtrooms open 6/22. The state is pretty much open now ;)
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Call UHAUL to help find a honest 2 men and a truck to box it all and haul it all to a 10x10 or a 10x14 rental space in a safe part of LA ( close to Woodland Hills or something-- yes it will be expensive) -- then you can go and comb through it all and find what you wish to save and then donate the rest to the St. Vincent de Paul society. I have boarded my dog before-- I had to get her a kennel cough shot. I did not stay gone long so boarding an animal is not the worst thing in the world. Pardon me for saying so but you are her daughter and whether it is convenient or who cares -- legal-- someone must help your MOM. Get going, girl. Put on the Big Girl Boots. And BE That Daughter.
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sunshinelife Jun 2020
great answer. i said the same about seeing her mum I get a feeling they were not so close. Because we share the same genetic stream does not guarantee loving relationships . Happy day to you
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I am I am so sorry you're going through this. My mom now lives with us and we care for her, but it was really hard when she lived across the country. And she would not always tell us when she was sick for in the hospital. We would find that out later after we finally made contact with her.

Until until we got her moved, what I had to do was rely on my friends and my contacts in the city and the state where my mom live to help me out. So do you have any of your friends are contacts that live near where your mom is that could help you out? If you do, then maybe they could go into the apartment and retrieve photos or anything that looks like something that you would want. The other question is do you even have a key to get into your mom's apartment? Will the landlord let you in or let a friend of yours in the apartment? Also if you have the money to travel across the country to do this yourself, do you have any friends in South Carolina that can watch your dogs while you go to California? Surely and hopefully your employer could be understanding that you need to go do this and they will give you some time off to take care of personal business like this.

Other than being able to do any of the above, I can only agree with the others who have posted that possibly a charity or a church organization or an advocacy group or individual can Take action on your part. What about calling Adult Protective Services in California and alerting them to the situation and see if they can do anything. Also what if you file an injunction to stop the landlord from taking action that will give you time to figure out what you can do and what you want to do. It seems right now this is new information to you about your mom and it's very upsetting. It's really hard to make these decisions when you feel like you've been clocked in the head with an emotional baseball bat. Definitely reach out within your community to get some support for yourself right now whether it's emotional or legal advice or anyting. Self care for yourself is important because this is very traumatic for you right now and you need some support of your own.
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Gyorgyi Jun 2020
Thank you for your reply and compassion. I am trying to keep my head above water so I don't end up in a facility myself.....
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