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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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My aunt and uncle enjoyed several senior bus trip vacations. I think one was almost a month long. The tour company "delivered" your luggage to your room each evening and picked it up from the room each morning. The hotels usually had several dining and shopping options close by (reasonable walk or covered by hotel shuttle) and every day or two the hotel had a laundry service turnaround that accommodated the tour. My aunt and uncle loved it; said having someone else driving and toting the luggage took most of the pain out of travel. Some tours supported wheelchair access. There were scheduled group events and enough free time to explore on your own or rest if you wanted.
If your father is still mentally clear and performing his ADLs then I would think he would do well in trips like this. He would be traveling in a group, have someone readily available to ask for assistance as needed, and at least a couple of check in points/times daily. If a friend or family member could travel along as a companion it might be close to perfect.
Has any one tried to use a virtual reality thing? If I could find something like that, I would try it first and see what his reaction would be. Other wise I would opt for the companion. I had an uncle that wanted to see the mountains and the ocean before his time expired. He hired my brother to drive him. Good thing too. He fell at a rest stop in Oregon ( he was from Illinois) and broke his hip. Long stay in hospital. Had to call his oldest son to come get him when it came time to be released.
I like that thought! Maybe the OP has one of those big surround theatres nearby, forget the term. There are some amazing shows, about mountains and whatnot.
My Grandmother went on bus trips with the local Senior "Fun Club" until she was age 94. If a family member could arrange to go with her, we would. If not, then the "Fun Club" Sponsor was Grandma's companion during the trips. The trips included short "Day Excursions" to a local theater show or a local tourist attraction such as the Zoo or a winery; or week long trips to locations such as Branson, MO; Las Vegas, NV; New England to see the fall foliage; Washington, DC; etc. Only after Grandma became too confused to be left alone in a motel/hotel room during a trip was our family able to convince her to quit going on these trips.
Since your Father is an Independent Living facility, he most likely is able to take care of himself with some supervision or very minimal assistance with his ADLs, such as dressing, toileting, transfers, eating, and walking with a cane or wheeled walker/rollator.
Talk to the IL Activity Director and ask whether your Father is participating in any of the facility's activities. And if he is not, then ask how you can encourage him to participate in the facility's activities.
Also talk with the IL Director or Social Worker to see what the guidelines are in regards to your Father going on a short trip overnight or 2-3 days without losing his apartment/room at the facility.
If your Father is able to be gone 2-3 days, then plan a short trip and accompany your Father so that you can see which ADLs (Activities of Daily Living) your Father can do by himself and which ADLs he needs assistance with and to determine how well he can adjust to all of the different situations that one experiences when traveling.
My Mom wanted to go to the Rocky Mountains (a favorite vacation location when I was growing up) but at age 85, she was not able to walk very far. So we found a motel that was decorated to resemble a mountain cabin and stayed there for a weekend. The motel walls looked like a log cabin and there were moose and bear motifs on the furniture and lamps. There was even a carved bear standing next to the front door of the lobby. Mom loved the motel and we had a great time.
We all get bored and need a "change of scenery". Maybe a short 6-8 hour trip to another city will be enough to satisfy your Father's desire to go on a two week vacation. Whatever your Father does, you need to be a part of the planning and you need to go with him or have a companion go with him in case he becomes sick or disoriented by the new/strange surroundings.
You go with him if possible. Say, dad, how bout if you and me take a trip or just a train trip somewhere to try out first. Let's test the waters first before leaping in totally. Take a weekend trip by train or plane and see if that helps. Plan a full 3 day weekend and see how he holds up. You should go if you can. I wish I did when my brothers took my mom to NY. I had every excuse not to go. My child, family, work, etc. I regret that.
If he is determined, and I know that mindset, a companion is a must. You kinda admire them for this, but the world is not so kind anymore.
I think I read some article that Compared cost of world cruise to cost of IL. But I refuse to go on vacation with 3k of my close friends. But that's me.
I don't want to be a downer here. But the reality is fact. Check fine print on his IL contract as to how long he can be gone. Before he will be forced to give up room. His funeral policy should he pass across state or international lines... Capitalism does not have better angels. Maybe funds are not an issue, but there's some homework here.
When is the last time he has taken a trip? Why get him to make a trip by airplane by himself to a relative. Perhaps helping to arrange a trip to a relative will be an eyeopener for him. Instead of discouraging the trip, insist that he have a traveling companion.
Oh yikes. Yes I would discourage. Can he watch Rick Steve's on PBS? I know well how they are when fiercely independent. I do. But he could easily be a victim of so much.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If your father is still mentally clear and performing his ADLs then I would think he would do well in trips like this. He would be traveling in a group, have someone readily available to ask for assistance as needed, and at least a couple of check in points/times daily. If a friend or family member could travel along as a companion it might be close to perfect.
I had an uncle that wanted to see the mountains and the ocean before his time expired. He hired my brother to drive him. Good thing too. He fell at a rest stop in Oregon ( he was from Illinois) and broke his hip. Long stay in hospital. Had to call his oldest son to come get him when it came time to be released.
Since your Father is an Independent Living facility, he most likely is able to take care of himself with some supervision or very minimal assistance with his ADLs, such as dressing, toileting, transfers, eating, and walking with a cane or wheeled walker/rollator.
Talk to the IL Activity Director and ask whether your Father is participating in any of the facility's activities. And if he is not, then ask how you can encourage him to participate in the facility's activities.
Also talk with the IL Director or Social Worker to see what the guidelines are in regards to your Father going on a short trip overnight or 2-3 days without losing his apartment/room at the facility.
If your Father is able to be gone 2-3 days, then plan a short trip and accompany your Father so that you can see which ADLs (Activities of Daily Living) your Father can do by himself and which ADLs he needs assistance with and to determine how well he can adjust to all of the different situations that one experiences when traveling.
My Mom wanted to go to the Rocky Mountains (a favorite vacation location when I was growing up) but at age 85, she was not able to walk very far. So we found a motel that was decorated to resemble a mountain cabin and stayed there for a weekend. The motel walls looked like a log cabin and there were moose and bear motifs on the furniture and lamps. There was even a carved bear standing next to the front door of the lobby. Mom loved the motel and we had a great time.
We all get bored and need a "change of scenery". Maybe a short 6-8 hour trip to another city will be enough to satisfy your Father's desire to go on a two week vacation. Whatever your Father does, you need to be a part of the planning and you need to go with him or have a companion go with him in case he becomes sick or disoriented by the new/strange surroundings.
I think I read some article that Compared cost of world cruise to cost of IL. But I refuse to go on vacation with 3k of my close friends. But that's me.
I don't want to be a downer here. But the reality is fact. Check fine print on his IL contract as to how long he can be gone. Before he will be forced to give up room. His funeral policy should he pass across state or international lines...
Capitalism does not have better angels. Maybe funds are not an issue, but there's some homework here.
He is 93 and he still has his mind, I think that he can do what he wants. If he had dementia, different story.
Is there a grandson, nephew, family friend that would be good with an all expenses paid vacay in exchange for assisting your dad?
We can't protect them from the inevitable, but we can make them very unhappy with the trying.
Can he watch Rick Steve's on PBS? I know well how they are when fiercely independent. I do. But he could easily be a victim of so much.