Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Landfill23, I am so sorry for the difficult situation you are in. Your mother’s behavior is very hurtful and although she is no doubt affected by her dementia now it sounds like she has never been the mother you deserved. 🙁
Can you take steps towards moving out? To an outsider at least it seems like it would be best for your mother to be cared for in a facility.
I am caring for my mother Diane, who is 79 years old, living at home with age-related decline, alzheimer's / dementia, arthritis, hearing loss, and incontinence.
I moved in with parents after my divorce, as my ex left me w/no money, job or house. My dad died in 2019, and because I live in-house, everyone expects me to take care of my mother. I am the oldest child and my younger brother and sister have their own families and live far away. The message I get from my whole family is "Atta girl! Thanks for what you do!" What I do is almost Everything!!! And that wouldn't be so bad, because I am a former healthcare worker, I have the education and experience to (and should be able to) detach myself from my mother's ongoing insults, complaining, criticisms, accusations, and now it's reached the point that she has actually come into my bedroom and bathroom, taken things and/or damaged things I own. There's no point in confronting her with these facts, because denial is the framework for her life.
My mother has never truly loved me. She's has serious mental health issues and is a recovering alcoholic. When I was a malleable little girl, things were ok, but once I became a teen, she started with the false accusations: I did this, or I did that. Now, she's calling me a b@#ch , that I get to do what I want to do, and that she doesn't, as in: food shopping, drs. appointments as I am disabled, basic chore trips. Somehow those chores are interpreted as a very fun time. I've asked her to go with me. No. She doesn't want to go. In essence, she resents me. She has said to me "F-you," and when I asked her why, her reason was because of the way I act, and I deserved it. Can't deal w/ much more of this.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Can you take steps towards moving out? To an outsider at least it seems like it would be best for your mother to be cared for in a facility.
I am caring for my mother Diane, who is 79 years old, living at home with age-related decline, alzheimer's / dementia, arthritis, hearing loss, and incontinence.
I moved in with parents after my divorce, as my ex left me w/no money, job or house. My dad died in 2019, and because I live in-house, everyone expects me to take care of my mother. I am the oldest child and my younger brother and sister have their own families and live far away. The message I get from my whole family is "Atta girl! Thanks for what you do!" What I do is almost Everything!!! And that wouldn't be so bad, because I am a former healthcare worker, I have the education and experience to (and should be able to) detach myself from my mother's ongoing insults, complaining, criticisms, accusations, and now it's reached the point that she has actually come into my bedroom and bathroom, taken things and/or damaged things I own. There's no point in confronting her with these facts, because denial is the framework for her life.
My mother has never truly loved me. She's has serious mental health issues and is a recovering alcoholic. When I was a malleable little girl, things were ok, but once I became a teen, she started with the false accusations: I did this, or I did that. Now, she's calling me a b@#ch , that I get to do what I want to do, and that she doesn't, as in: food shopping, drs. appointments as I am disabled, basic chore trips. Somehow those chores are interpreted as a very fun time. I've asked her to go with me. No. She doesn't want to go. In essence, she resents me. She has said to me "F-you," and when I asked her why, her reason was because of the way I act, and I deserved it. Can't deal w/ much more of this.
Clearly, you are living in misery. You moved in with your mom after your divorce. It’s not working out for either of you.
Oh, she needs care, but not by you. You are in need of a home, but not hers.
Start looking for a job and an apartment. Get a roommate if needed. Don’t stay with your mom anymore. It’s not worth it.
Don’t blame this on your siblings. Find a way out and live life on your own.
Best wishes to you.