He has signed a condo over to him at his death and maybe other things. HIS TWO WEALTHY CHILDREN and grandkids have now come in on her and secretly got Power of Attorney (not yet signed by his doctor)...put grandson in the condo. and went to bank and TOLD THEM they had POA and got into their checking account. The husband is not wanting to make his kids mad; but, they are completely destroying my friend. She has to do everything for him and has all these years. His children have never helped her with him. Are there any legal things in something like this or should she stop the ongoing verbal abuse from the kids and let them take over the husband's care? He is beginning to demand more and more care and she is willing to continue caring for him because she DOES love him. Thank you!!!!
Doctors don't have to sign POA documents. I'm not sure what you mean by that. Are they trying to get someone to say your friend's husband is now unable to make decisions himself?
To get a POA the document must be signed by the principle and that signature must be notarized. It can't be done "secretly." But even if they have a valid POA, your friends husband can easily remove them as POA. He can (and should) give his wife that authority.
And most often a bank won't even consider a regular POA, but wants documents in the bank's format to allow others access to the account. So how they are getting in the account is a mystery. Could they have taken Dad to the bank and he signed something there, giving the access authority?
Do your friend and her husband own the condo jointly?
This story sounds sad, but the description here sounds incomplete. Could you provide a bit more detail?
Kids can't secretly "get" POA, the document is something that must be signed by the grantor (friend's husband)... did he perhaps make such a document at some time in his past before their marriage?
Is this man of sound mind to make his own choices? If so then his kids can not override his right to make his own choices, but if not the problem could get ugly and your friend may have to petition the court and fight for guardianship.