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It’s worth looking at alternatives to giving him free reign in the bathroom:
- Lock the bathroom door and give him a commode instead. It then doesn’t all have to go down the pan.
- Take away his underwear and substitute depends.
- It’s just possible that the excess wiping/scraping is because he is making a mess he wants to clean up. Is he leaving 'traces', or does he wipe it all clean?
- Put a camera in the bathroom and see what is really going on.
-Tell him that a key reason why people end up in Care Facilities is incontinence, fecal incontinence particularly. He sorts out this behavior or that might be the result for him too.
- See if he will play with paper as an activity, not associated with the toilet.

What you do about this will probably depend on where you think your H is at mentally, and on whether you can cope financially with the plumber's bills. Good luck!
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Reply to MargaretMcKen
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Consider a motion sensor that tells you he's in the bathroom. Also unhook the chain so the toilet won't flush, or if he's apt to figure that out and re-hook it then turn off the water and remove the flapper altogether... yes that's a pain but it's less of a pain than a clogged toilet.
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Reply to cwillie
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Hi all, thanks for the responses. I have tried filling out small portions, using trailer toilet paper. He uses napkins (then I hide them) he uses paper towels.
he puts scotch tape or pieces of cut up cardboard
I can’t watch him or accompany him 24/7. I work in the house, I need to cook & clean, take care of my dogs, etc
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Reply to mushmaus
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Anxietynacy Sep 23, 2024
It sounds like your dad might be declining, might be time to think about memory care
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Yes. Accompany him to the bathroom every time he goes in there. Dementia reaches the point where they cannot be left alone, even in the bathroom. Either that or dole out small amounts of tp.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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I am wondering if the obsession is with the bathroom itself, with thinking he needs to go more than he does, or with the bathroom TISSUE.
It sounds as though he is clogging the toilet with tissue if I am correct?
You can go about this several ways.
1. Buy tissue that is meant for trailer facilities or for septic tanks or for boating. This tissue disintigrates easily and quickly. HOWEVER it's expensive.
2. Keep minimal amounts of tissue wound onto the toilet paper dispenser role. A pain in the neck, yes, but less likely to clog.
3. Be certain to keep wipes, facial tissue and other multi-ply tissues out of the bathroom.

I doubt hubby could be mentally acute enough now to use bidets or cleansing clothes that aren't disposed down the toilet.

If you are getting a new toilet I recommend the new Koehlers. They are nigh on impossible to clog, use minimal water and give a powerful flush. Do know that when installed these need a special Koehler ring, or may leak around the flooring.

Best of luck. About all I can think of here.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I'm curious, as to the obsession part?

Does he endlessly talk about?

Upset when he
Can't go?
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Reply to Anxietynacy
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Sounds like he's suffering from some OCD behaviors which is very common when someone has dementia.
I would talk to his doctor about putting him some medication for his OCD, and see if that doesn't help.
Or perhaps just let him use a bedside commode that you can empty yourself and not plug up your toilets.
Dementia sucks and all that goes along with it. I hope this phase will be over soon.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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