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My mom is in a skilled nursing facility and has been for 2 months she has dementia and lately has had a bit of a temper that concerns me. She has a very nice roommate who also has dementia. At first they got along, but now my mom's paranoia has kicked in she thinks her roommate is stealing and she just has a dislike toward her. I worry that my mom might smack her and her roommate is very passive polite and nice. Have asked the facility to please move my mom but they are full. They have adjusted my moms psychiatric medication. My mom is so aggressive and agitated. I may be worried for no reason because my mom has never been violent but this dementia had changed her. I don't want her to get evicted or say something that may cause concern. My mom has not been violent but I do not like her attitude toward her roommate. Any advice?

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Sounds like one of the ladies across from the room I am in, though her roommate and sometimes lash out at the aides more then each other. Both can (and have) put any aides assigned to them through the wringer 😆. Both have made for some interesting days, especially the one who has come to the doorway sans panties ( though she has something to cover her privates)
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Does your mom still have a PCP? Maybe s/he would be willing to call the facility and recommend a more appropriate psych medication. Buspar is not usually used for dementia with paranoia.
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You say that they "have adjusted her psychiatric medications". Looks like you HAVE the only support that is available for this problem. They will have an eye on your Mom now, and you are in communication with them. So this is a day to day thing, in which the drug cocktails may get adjusted and there may or may not be relief for your Mom. It is up to the facility where she lives, where they daily and by the minute function with her, to decide if she can remain where she is or if she needs placement in a more psychiatric-problem facility. I wish you good luck, but to me it sounds like you have everything in the best working order that there can be.

I hope you'll update us how things are going, and I am so sorry you're going through this.
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There are medications that do help with aggressive and paranoid behaviors, so I would continue to talk to her doctors to make sure that she's on the right ones.
Increasing the one she's already on may not be the right answer, so keep on her doctor until they get it right.
And I do know that some of the medications that are prescribed to supposedly help with aggression, actually make things worse, so do your homework on the medications that your mom is on now to see if that may be the case.
Best wishes in getting things figured out for your mom.
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If mom has had a sudden change in mental status, I would
Inform her doc
Get her tested for a UTI
Consider ER if she is displaying extreme behavioral symptoms.
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Mgee6063 Nov 2023
my mom's psychiatric med busbar has been increased and moving her won't help as I think she would still be mean. Or worse get a horrible roommate.
her roommate is very passive, friendly and lately scared of my mom because my mom yells at her for no reason.
She was checked for a UTI last week and negative.
I feel bad because her roommate doesn't deserve being yelled at and live in fear of my mom. My mom is normally don't like this she's never been a mean person The dementia has twisted her thinking.
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