My mother, 87 years old with dementia complains that she can not hear. I have taken her to the doctor, they do a hearing test and they say she is fine. No hearing aids are necessary. But when I speak to her she says she can not hear me. Anyone have the same problem or have suggestions?
It's then a brain issue. It depends on her level of dementia, but can also be caused by strokes and heart issues.
However there could be another reason: She may be practicing "selective hearing" and this is a favorite behavior of dysfunctional parents.
So, think about what type of relationship you have with your mother. Was she always the type to inflict guilt trips or attempt to control people with physical ailments? If so, she may be using selective hearing as a manipulative behavior.
I often see this with clients. The parent obviously hears every word spoken by me, but when their children say something they do not want to hear, they claim they can not hear them.
One client complained that she was talking with her brother and he was on a phone two rooms away from the mother, and her mother did not like what she heard the son telling the daughter, so she began yelling, from two rooms away, that what the son was saying was not true. Then she got on the phone, repeated every word the brother said, and claimed it was a lie.
Prior to that however, she would often tell her daughter that she could not hear her, each time she offered the mother a suggestion regarding her health or some other issue the mother refused to address.
Just some food for thought.