Are they entitled to do this? I became aware one day when I was having a conversation with my mum about a pencil case that was missing. It had been missing for a while but the day after the conversation the pencil case appeared back in her room.
The manager of the home and her friend who is one of the activities coordinators have also had a snoop at my FB page recently. All of this makes me uneasy and I’m not sure what to do or if I should trust them with the care of my parents. I only realised the listening device was there today when I took a closer look at it. Previously I had thought it was something to do with the heating.
However, several years ago I received 2 solicitations from FB, under the guise of "knowing" or "communicating" with other FB members. Besides including a relative and the salon where I get my hair permed, there was one person who was a potential contractor.
He sent me a quote by e-mail, as we discussed. I never e-mailed him, nor was I aware he was an FB member. Yet FB was able to determine that he sent me a quote.
The only way it could do that is through some monitoring system of his mail, and recipients.
Big Brother isn't the government; it's FB and tracking devices (such as cookies) on line.
No I don’t live in the NH area. They don’t either and live even further away. We have no mutual friends either. If you do have FB lists them by number underneath your profile pic. I haven’t always lived where I live at the moment. I used to live about 150mls away but now only 15mls. Thanks, I will let you know what happens. Her special needs are that she has late stages Alz. The home state in their glossy brochure that they are trained to nurse residents with Alz, although on a couple of occasions when my mum became aggressive suddenly there were large multi agency meetings and the manager was suggesting that they wouldn’t look after my mum any more. The aggression settled down and they are ok now but the real reason for not wanting her appears to be inadequate staffing in the evenings and weekends and appropriately qualified staffing.
I would be uneasy too, kinda creeped out. One thing I was thinking tho about FB is, do you live in the area of the NH? Have you always lived there?
Since the workers at the home also live in the area, you both might have the same person(s) on your friends list. That would definitely cause them, and others, to pop up on "ppl you might know". Just a thought.
Plz let us know if you ask someone what's on Mom's door. I'd really like to know why they singled Mom out. Does she have any special needs that would require added monitoring/security?
I know they have been looking at my FB because they both popped up in my people you may know section. I keep my FB very private and only really post family pictures or days out on it for my reference. I don’t post anything to do with the home at all. I also have never uploaded my e-mail or phone contacts to FB and I have no common ground with the two members of staff. A colleague of mine who is well qualified and in I.T. said that in those circumstances the only way they would pop up there is if they had purposefully searched me out on FB. It just makes me uneasy.
I also wondered how it could be detected that someone read someone's FB page. I've never used it (never will) so I'm not familiar with what others can see or how it works if someone is "friended" or not "friended".
Not that I know of with FB that's why I asked how she knew they snooped her page.
I don't use Face Book and was wondering if one can tell who actually did read a person's facebook page. Is there a list of names of who took a look at a page? Just curious.
Did you look by other residents doors to see if the same thing was there too? Why not just point it out to the HN and ask about it? I'm sure it would ease your mind.
How did you know they looked at your FB page?
Since the item had been missing for a while it is entirely possible Mother mentioned to some staff member, who recognized it when she happened upon it, and returned it to the room. Or if Mother's name or code was on it, anyone could have known where it belonged. Its return may or may not have been related to the conversation about it between Mother and OP.
My mom's treasured lap blanket went missing at her NH. We told staff about it and a notation was made in her file. Someone on the staff noticed the note and said she wondered if that was the one she found in the lobby and returned to another resident, Joe. Yup. Joe had it. He had one of his own, with the same team logo in the same colors. It is understandable that the aide thought it was his and that Joe wasn't with-it enough to realize it wasn't his. Outcome is that Mom got her team lap blanket back.
There are seldom sinister motives behind missing items and the best way to get them back is to mark everything with a name or room number or ID code, and to report missing items to staff.
We don't know if this is truly a listening device, and if it is, whether it has been explained to Mother. Maybe she even signed off that she was aware of it.
We only have a few observations to go on. We don't know the whole picture, and I suspect neither does ELS1el.
Best starting place is to discuss this calmly with the NH manager or DON.
if theres a listening device that would seem weird to me. at least in our situation (AL)
Are you absolutely sure it's an eavesdropping device? Have you asked police to verify that?
Are all her possessions identified with her name?
In reality, you aren't on firm grounds complaining that some reviewed your FB page. If you read the TOS, you'll probably find something buried in the legalese that authorizes this. Remember, Mr. Z hasn't been in the news and gotten a lot of bad publicity b/c he's such a nice guy.
You open your up to loss of privacy when you post on FB.
I also wonder how and why staff would have the time to prowl online and snoop out someone's FB page though. This doesn't make sense to me.
Have you contacted an administrator about this?
I apologize for sounding glib but I'm not sure I understand what the motivation would be to take a pencil case and then put it back, after listening in to one of a dozen or more resident doorways. It's a weird scenario to me.
If it is a listening device, perhaps it is to help monitor residents. But there should be a way for you to shut it off while you are visiting. When Mom is all alone or just with her roommate, maybe it is appropriate. But listening in on your conversations without your knowledge or approval doesn't sound legal to me. Discuss this with the director of nursing. Don't be emotional, and don't make accusations, but seek information and a way to preserve your privacy.
What you put on facebook is generally public. You can protect some aspects of your information by making it "private" but you should always assume anyone can see it. I wince when I read some people complaining bitterly about their jobs or their bosses. Would they really not mind if their boss happened to see that? I often posted about experiences at my mother's NH, and I would not have minded if someone on the staff read it. I never posted negatively about my work.
Things go missing in nursing homes. Residents misplace things themselves. Other residents "borrow" them. (Usually more than half the residents have dementia.) And with listening devices or not, sometimes those items find their ways back into the right room. Missing items ought to be reported to staff, so if they happen upon them they'll know where to return them.
1) Talk to the manager or don about the listening device.
2) Realize that anyone may see your fb postings, and post accordingly.
3) Report missing items to staff. Be glad if a missing item returns!
How is the care your mother is receiving outside of this privacy issue? Is she content there? Is she eating and drinking enough? Does she get some appropriate level of exercise? Social activity? Does she sleep well? Are they attentive to her health needs?