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My mother is talking non-stop again today. She will maintain a somewhat even keel for a few weeks then hit one day when this happens. She does not talk to me, just to 'other people' in the room. Every once in a while she will break out in song. Otherwise, she has been going downhill fairly steadily. She doesn't eat the way she used to. She usually wants breakfast; some days that's the only meal she eats. I gave her breakfast today and all she wanted to eat was her waffle. She is deaf, but I use a hearing amplifier to try to communicate with her. Today she can't hear even with the amplifier turned all the way up. I think she is in her final days. I read an article yesterday about the signs to tell if your loved one is dying. She checked off every one of the signs.
Be grateful they are speaking intelligible words. Mom has had 3 strokes in 3 months and a conversation revolves with the word "come"...the only word she can say!
I had this problem! It was very distracting in the car while I'm trying to drive. One solution---music. Try that or the TV or an audio book. One of these may focus the persons attention. If necessary, just walk away(not possible in the car). Put some headphones on yourself (not in car) or even try them on him. Just keep trying different things. This behavior eventually stopped only to be replace with something else.
When my mother doesn't sleep and gets very confused she starts talking, not to me but to imaginary people in the room. What she says is all made up stuff which has no basis in reality. Sometimes she goes on for 2 days with no sleep. Sometimes she gets mad at the imaginary people for not answering her. When this happens she won't acknowledge that I am even there, she only wants to talk to the other people. The pattern is that I just have to wait until she gets so exhausted that she goes to sleep. After she gets sleep she is more normal.
My husband is doing this .Sometimes he talks 24 hours,Even while sleeping he is talking about being a boss on a job and directing men where to work and etc, I listen sometimes just to hear what he is saying. Its like he is in a dream world. Then I tune it out by watching tv. When he first got sick with Dementia it happened overnight he would say ugly things and be mean to me.This was a sweet loving man that never hit me and anything I wanted I got, Now he is very mean.
My mother does the same thing, NON-STOP talking! All the time. Every day. All day. All night. As long as she has another person around, she will perpetually chatter. It exhausts everyone in the room! My husband says it is because she sucks all of the oxygen out of the room! The last time I took her to the ER was the absolute worst; they placed the oxygen monitor on her and the machine kept beeping loudly. I noticed as she kept talking, her oxygen level would drop and the machine would beep. I told her she had to stop talking in order to keep her oxygen level up. Finally an ER nurse came in and insisted I step out of the room for a while bc Mom would continue to chatter as long as I was with her. They wanted her to be quiet, too. I went down to the cafeteria for a cup of coffee. When I got back the nurses thanked me for giving them a break from her constant louder-than-inside-voice level, which quickly erodes patience. I wish I had suggestions for you. I have tried everything, but all efforts have proven futile. If you find something that works, please share it. Many of us would appreciate anything that works. Blessings for a quiet and peaceful day.
I'm not a doctor, but my Dad started talking nonstop at one point. I asked if they changed his medicine and found out that they started giving him something for anxiety. Instead of calming him down, it made him manic. They changed his meds and he was back to his usual self. I hope you find a solution to your Dad's change in behavior.
Have you tried giving him simple but repetitive tasks to do? Things like folding towels, organizing pictures, and clipping coupons can help calm his brain. Also, YouTube has a bunch of nature and other types of soothing videos that are many hours long.
I am not sure why this happens...my friend became a nonstop talker after she got her teaching degree...like she felt she had to not create any silent moments whatsoever. I would just play along with it as best as possible. My husband likes to tune me out at times. Sometimes he just says "yes" and I am sure he isn't listening....I like to test him at times by throwing in a "do you think I look fat or haggard today?" and he will answer "yes", or I make a ridiculous statement about something to see if he is listening, like "I drained all the bank accounts and bought a purple sports car or a yellow yacht, to which the response is "yes".......
My father does a fair amount of non-stop complaining, which is his version of an unending loop. I find it hard to cope with too.
In my reading I have learned that as the brain undergoes physical changes from the progression of the dementia, the area where people derive their ability to be self-regulating begins to disappear. The outcome can be compulsive and obsessive behaviors, including talking. Another unfortunate result of damage in that area of the brain is that they often lose their filter for the kinds of things they say.
My partially deaf father began to express his observations about other people somewhat loudly in public places, particularly in doctor's waiting rooms. Usually his comments are about people's weight or other factors concerning their appearance, and rarely complimentary. I used to be ready to hand him a magazine to distract him but when he stopped reading, I resorted to Facebook. First thing in the morning I would load up my feed with pictures of things I knew he liked like flowers, animals, art, beautiful places, etc. I made sure to like my own posts and requested that my husband also like my posts so that I could quickly retrieve them on my phone. I pull it out and start showing him pictures as soon as we arrive and it keeps him distracted for now.
As for the non-stop complaining, I can't say that much in the way of behavior-shaping responses really work with him. It's probably unfair for us to assume that we can evoke a normal response from missing brain matter by some persuasive means. I concentrate on my own coping skills but when I'm at my limit, I raise the issue with his neurologist. He recently increased one of his medications for its mood-stabilizing effect. We're all keeping our fingers crossed for a reprieve from the challenging behaviors.
So much about dementia caregiving is hard, and some of it is downright crazy-making for us. Best to you.
I feel your pain, my father was the same and still does at times. Just try and be patient with him, it will lessen in time. I never found anything to stop it. i would step outside for awhile when it got to be too much for me.
Mom is 90. Five years ago dad, her only caregiver, died. For the first year she constantly charged around the house saying "where's dad, where's dad". Slowly and with the help of taking her off namenda and aricept, adding natural supplements, she calmed down. The constant quest of finding dad declined. Whenever she got something in her head she would get frantic, focusing only on her obsession and if you didn't comply she would get angry and lash out. Like a toddler overdue for its nap. I tried something once and it worked. In the middle of her fit, I said "thank you mom" in a very loving tone. It stopped her mind. She looked up at me and focused on something other than her obsessive frustrating thought and calmed down. I think what happened was she stopped her thoughts and wondered what good thing she had done to receive a thank you. We continue to use this phrase and it works about 80% of the time. The more upset she gets the calmer we try to be. I got the idea from studying an ancient Hawaiian healing art, Ho'oponopono, Dr. Hew Lin. Very powerful. Hope this helps.
I took my aunt off Aricept, which helped her bizarre dreams and nightmares. What kind of natural supplements have you tried? Thanks for the ideas of "Thank you mom" and EFT.
My mother didn't have dementia but she would talk non-stop. When we were in the car I entertained myself by timing how long she would be quiet. One time it got up to 45 seconds. If she started complaining, I would time it again then after whatever time I had set in my mind I would say. "We have talked about upsetting things for XX minutes, let's talk about something upbuilding for a little bit" One time it took her about 15 minutes to shift her mind and finally all she could think of was "So, how are the kids?"
With dementia, I doubt you can distract them but might be a try. Maybe notice something by the side of the road.
Take into account hearing, sight, memory as a 24/7 CG Keep questions and answers short and easy. Try not to lose your cool 😎 or Temper😡 into overreacting to any basics topic for communication. Then you have to carry on with your own life or others with what ever energy or life you have left in you. Hopefully you get to what you want to feel as normalcy and you wake up in morning and feel good like fresh new spring air and windows open. I’m not talking about spraying a aerosol can in rooms and it smells fresh.
A women who recently moved into my father's memory care neighborhood seems to be a nonstop talker and it escalates when she has an anxiety attack, which seems to be happening with increasing frequency. It's affecting the other residents who were living together reasonably well. Thankfully my father wears hearing aids and the batteries sometimes wear down. She is very hard to calm down and I don't know anyone has discovered the trick. I was looking here for suggestions.
Lj959... I second the suggestion to "enjoy" the talk. My Husband was for the most part non verbal for the last 7 years of his life. He did make moaning or humming sounds and I dearly would have loved words instead...I think.... People often asked me how I could tolerate the noise and I pretty much just ignored it. There were times when the volume or intensity of his noise would change. (He had always been a Bears and Cubs fan so when I put games on for him his volume would increase. I would love to think on some level he understood what was going on) So for the most part try to ignore but listen with 1 ear you never know what is going to come out that will be important. If his talking or rambling do not require an answer there is no need to reply other than once in a while maybe a "Oh, really?" or "Wow". But enjoy the sound of his voice. You might even want to record some just to listen to after he is gone. And with Dementia..this too may pass and he will be on to some other quirk that will drive you bonkers.
My partner has dementia and Alzheimer's. She was a professional and a number of our friends are professionals that dealt with behavior. She was a very quiet person. The last few weeks she has felt a need to talk constantly. She feels she needs to teach people and entertain them is why she talks so much. She talks non-stop to the caregivers. She is in hospice. Yes hospice can drug her up. Even is the person is not in hospice there are a number of drugs to help calm them. I don't like that and she does not either. There are some things you can do that are more gentle. Her mind is being over stimulated to much from all the talking. Playing quiet music during the day and quiet meditation music at night helps alot. I also slowed down visitation, minimized the time and number of people, phone calls, etc. Their minds are being over stimulated. Taking more naps in a quiet place with quiet music - no TV, people talking, etc.
I like the music idea. It worked for me and my aunt with dementia. When on long car rides (which she also enjoys and is a great passenger), I would make sure we had plenty of diversified music, some of which I was sure she knew the words to. Music is definitely a mood elevator. Good for patient and caregiver alike.
In terms of coping, does your LO sing? I find singing easier to listen to so when these spells come up I would start singing a song or hymn from my childhood and soon my father would join in. We might sing for 15-30 minutes, he would keep the song going as I moved in/out of the room. When the singing stopped, the non-stop chatter (or more likely fussing from my father) didn't restart for at least an hour.
My mother does sing, but the problem is she sounds like a screeching cat! I have learned to tune her out for the most part and carry on with whatever I am doing,
My thought is LJ enjoy these conversations with your Dad because all too soon your Father will not be with you and suddenly that silence will seem deafening. If you find your Dad annoying then just reply "yes" "goodness me", "Heavens" "oh my God"....... and so on. Remember to keep in touch as this wonderful Site is a great Place to release or vent, and to get great help from Fellow Caregivers Who are or have been on this very same journey as you.
Not sure if your request for ideas is for ideas for why this is happening now, how to alter it, or how to deal with it. I think the fact that Alzheimer's is involved is different from other responses dealing with "normal" people. My mother has always talked a lot. Every subject reminds her of something else, which starts a replay of that experience. The problem is usually it reminds her of something very negative or depressing. If I am patient and just let her talk, I feel like I am reinforcing very negative thoughts, which is not very good for either one of us. If I interrupt her she gets upset. Wish I could find the best way to deal with this.
Yes, actually, I do have a suggestion. I'm not a qualified behavioral specialist, but how many of us are? Unspoken racing thoughts are often hard to detect, and in my case they continue to race round and round, sometimes with partial solutions that are never fully thought out and implemented. I suffer from inaction, sometimes seen by others as procrastination. It simply means that I try to see all possible outcomes of my actions(not possible) before I finally commit and take a chance by either saying something or doing something. Recording a long sequence of verbalization and playing it back may have some effect, if you can capture the attention of the listener long enough to focus on the exercise. a simple phrase said kindly such as "This is you, listen..." A few times of that including something like "This is what you sound like to the world" just might raise the awareness of the speaker. Please keep in mind that I am not a Doctor, although I play one on AgingCare..
This might help someone with self awareness but most likely not someone with dementia. If I correct, even with the nicest tone and words, my mil starts in on her "sins" and how dumb she is. About 8 years before diagnosis, I noticed that my mil started talking a lot more than usual. We chalked it up to living alone. But now I feel it was the beginning of her dementia symptoms. She still talks a lot but is often ridiculous stuff. Today she asked me if Jacob (my oldest son) had well to do parents! I reminded her that my husband and I are his parents. She took that well. Answering that she had never put that together. ; ) I let a lot go in one ear and out the other but do try to respond in some fashion. It's always interesting! And sometimes frustrating.
Tune him out and smile and nod .We have the issue where she will say uhhh.... repeatedly but following it up with teeth chomping....so uuuh chomp uuugh chomp...hours and hours and when she is waking up she chomps her teeth so loudly in a way that would give ME a headache if I didn't actively tune it out.Im shocked it doesn't hurt her teeth and she has no dental issues surprisingly. She isn't chatty but blank except occassional dinging which comes out of the blue... I think I'd welcome the chatting over this.lol.I guess what I mean to say is it could be worse😉. Just breathe.lol
What happens if you don't engage in the conversation?
If your father is happy to prattle on in spite of one-word replies, or your leaving the room, or your turning up the TV volume, or whatever, do you need to do anything about it?
But if you're worried that the sudden change in him might be a sign of something else, or if your father is becoming agitated and upset, talk to his doctor about it.
I have no ideas. Just more patience to listen. My Mom is a talker non stop. I have just had to pray for patience to be loving and just listen. Its difficult as I am quite an introvert and not much of a talker, but she talks a lot. I love her and thats what I do to get through it, pray and just lover her.
Having a Dementia this could be anxiety and there are meds for that. Their minds just jump around. No clear continuous thought. As his doctor about it. It really isn't fair to them.
My mom's table mate at the nursing home does this, an endless loop of semi nonsensical chatter that can't be called conversation and is almost impossible to respond to - I'm only exposed to it over the dinner hour but some days I have to excuse myself to get away for a few minutes, you have my sympathy.
My aunt and grandfather both did this. My aunt's began in her 80s and I've wondered if something popped in her brain to cause this--maybe a mini stroke? Once when I was staying at her house she talked nonstop from 11 p.m. to 8:00 a.m.! Because I loved her and didn't see her very often I listened to her all night.
Aside from drugging them silly, which I wouldn't do, the only solution is to get out of the house.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
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Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
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Need more details - what does he talk about? is he making sense? etc
My husband likes to tune me out at times. Sometimes he just says "yes" and I am sure he isn't listening....I like to test him at times by throwing in a "do you think I look fat or haggard today?" and he will answer "yes", or I make a ridiculous statement about something to see if he is listening, like "I drained all the bank accounts and bought a purple sports car or a yellow yacht, to which the response is "yes".......
In my reading I have learned that as the brain undergoes physical changes from the progression of the dementia, the area where people derive their ability to be self-regulating begins to disappear. The outcome can be compulsive and obsessive behaviors, including talking. Another unfortunate result of damage in that area of the brain is that they often lose their filter for the kinds of things they say.
My partially deaf father began to express his observations about other people somewhat loudly in public places, particularly in doctor's waiting rooms. Usually his comments are about people's weight or other factors concerning their appearance, and rarely complimentary. I used to be ready to hand him a magazine to distract him but when he stopped reading, I resorted to Facebook. First thing in the morning I would load up my feed with pictures of things I knew he liked like flowers, animals, art, beautiful places, etc. I made sure to like my own posts and requested that my husband also like my posts so that I could quickly retrieve them on my phone. I pull it out and start showing him pictures as soon as we arrive and it keeps him distracted for now.
As for the non-stop complaining, I can't say that much in the way of behavior-shaping responses really work with him. It's probably unfair for us to assume that we can evoke a normal response from missing brain matter by some persuasive means. I concentrate on my own coping skills but when I'm at my limit, I raise the issue with his neurologist. He recently increased one of his medications for its mood-stabilizing effect. We're all keeping our fingers crossed for a reprieve from the challenging behaviors.
So much about dementia caregiving is hard, and some of it is downright crazy-making for us. Best to you.
Some meds can cause excessive talking.
Also, anxiety can cause someone to become excessively chatty.
i would step outside for awhile when it got to be too much for me.
With dementia, I doubt you can distract them but might be a try. Maybe notice something by the side of the road.
Keep questions and answers short and easy.
Try not to lose your cool 😎 or Temper😡 into overreacting to any basics topic for communication. Then you have to carry on with your own life or others with what ever energy or life you have left in you.
Hopefully you get to what you want to feel as normalcy and you wake up in morning and feel good like fresh new spring air and windows open. I’m not talking about spraying a aerosol can in rooms and it smells fresh.
I second the suggestion to "enjoy" the talk.
My Husband was for the most part non verbal for the last 7 years of his life. He did make moaning or humming sounds and I dearly would have loved words instead...I think....
People often asked me how I could tolerate the noise and I pretty much just ignored it. There were times when the volume or intensity of his noise would change. (He had always been a Bears and Cubs fan so when I put games on for him his volume would increase. I would love to think on some level he understood what was going on)
So for the most part try to ignore but listen with 1 ear you never know what is going to come out that will be important. If his talking or rambling do not require an answer there is no need to reply other than once in a while maybe a "Oh, really?" or "Wow".
But enjoy the sound of his voice.
You might even want to record some just to listen to after he is gone.
And with Dementia..this too may pass and he will be on to some other quirk that will drive you bonkers.
She is in hospice. Yes hospice can drug her up. Even is the person is not in hospice there are a number of drugs to help calm them. I don't like that and she does not either. There are some things you can do that are more gentle. Her mind is being over stimulated to much from all the talking. Playing quiet music during the day and quiet meditation music at night helps alot. I also slowed down visitation, minimized the time and number of people, phone calls, etc. Their minds are being over stimulated. Taking more naps in a quiet place with quiet music - no TV, people talking, etc.
Unspoken racing thoughts are often hard to detect, and in my case they continue to race round and round, sometimes with partial solutions that are never fully thought out and implemented. I suffer from inaction, sometimes seen by others as procrastination. It simply means that I try to see all possible outcomes of my actions(not possible) before I finally commit and take a chance by either saying something or doing something.
Recording a long sequence of verbalization and playing it back may have some effect, if you can capture the attention of the listener long enough to focus on the exercise. a simple phrase said kindly such as "This is you, listen..."
A few times of that including something like "This is what you sound like to the world" just might raise the awareness of the speaker.
Please keep in mind that I am not a Doctor, although I play one on AgingCare..
If I correct, even with the nicest tone and words, my mil starts in on her "sins" and how dumb she is.
About 8 years before diagnosis, I noticed that my mil started talking a lot more than usual. We chalked it up to living alone. But now I feel it was the beginning of her dementia symptoms.
She still talks a lot but is often ridiculous stuff. Today she asked me if Jacob (my oldest son) had well to do parents! I reminded her that my husband and I are his parents. She took that well. Answering that she had never put that together. ; )
I let a lot go in one ear and out the other but do try to respond in some fashion. It's always interesting! And sometimes frustrating.
If your father is happy to prattle on in spite of one-word replies, or your leaving the room, or your turning up the TV volume, or whatever, do you need to do anything about it?
But if you're worried that the sudden change in him might be a sign of something else, or if your father is becoming agitated and upset, talk to his doctor about it.
Aside from drugging them silly, which I wouldn't do, the only solution is to get out of the house.