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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I looked back on your past posts. 3 years ago the other siblings (all live out of the area) wanted to move her to live with one of them. Why didn't that happen?
You also wrote that they contribute financially. Is that still the case? What are expenses? Does you MIL have in-home help? I'm assuming she does not live with you.
I also read that your husband doesn't even make the decisions on her care.
Your MIL needs to live near those who make the decisions for her care.
Are any of the other siblings having their retirement accounts depleted? Are any of the in-law spouses have their retirement accounts depleted?
All of her children and families cover the majority of her care in an upscale assisted living facility but actually needs full care. She qualifies for medicaid and this could have been handled differently. She requires someone to be with her at all times due to her many medical conditions. I think all of the family realizes the $4,550 a month fee for her assisted living can not be kept up for a long period of time but some can not make up their minds because they feel guilty or do not want extended family and friends to think badly of them. The worse part is she does not want to live anywhere besides with one of her childrens' families. Problem is all of her children and spouses are now over seventy years old and physically and probably mentally can not handle her care on a full time basis. Also all live in different states many miles apart. It is difficult for all involved in her care. One of her children has been making most of the decisions for her care and that causes conflict among the other children and their spouses. We are all just trying to cope as best we can.
If she cannot afford to pay for AL then apply to Medicaid. Retirement rule #1 from an investment standpoint, is to never take any money out of these accounts until one at least reaches retirement age, then the money is there for you and your spouse, not your MIL.
Medsister, are you paying for in home health Aids or Assisted Living? My hunch is you are doing either one because those don't take Medicaid. Its a tough situation to be in, either use up your money to pay for AL or Home Care or get MIL on Medicaid and place her in a potentially less desirable Nursing Home. I suppose you have to ask yourself if you feel its better to sacrifice your future comfort for your MIL and how you will feel about it 20-30 years down the road. GL!
OK, so you say its you and hubs accounts that are being used. Why?? Can you give us more info? I agree with Worried in Cali. Is she in any kind of assistance? If not, look into it!
Not understanding if you mean her accounts, or your own. If her account, then that is what they are for, to pay for her care; when they are depleted she would have to go on medicaid. If you mean your own accounts I am shuddering with despair. I hope not. Please come back and give us some details.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You also wrote that they contribute financially. Is that still the case? What are expenses? Does you MIL have in-home help? I'm assuming she does not live with you.
I also read that your husband doesn't even make the decisions on her care.
Your MIL needs to live near those who make the decisions for her care.
Are any of the other siblings having their retirement accounts depleted? Are any of the in-law spouses have their retirement accounts depleted?
What is really going on here?
Her funds should pay for her care. If she is destitute, then apply for Medicaid.
If you mean your own accounts I am shuddering with despair. I hope not. Please come back and give us some details.
Her money should pay or she can apply for public assistance.
Who is going to pay for you if you get sick and need care?