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Well DownSouth, it may not be too late as things are still in draft form/in progress maybe...thanks for the idea. I am immensely disappointed with this elder law specialist who came highly regarded. I don't think she bothered to get to know details, just asked him questions without educating him or sharing info on possible scenarios. Dad is rather naive and I was shocked to learn that the attny said dad does not want to sign a caregiver agreement (which I did NOT mention or want either) but also that he wants to use all assets and monies to keep my mom and him going. However, I am a part of that, doing more and more, and he doesn't understand that caregiving tasks have value. He foolishly said he did not even want to use the medicaid exception rule because I don't think he wants to sign the house over to me. I get that, he wants an even division of the estate, although my sibling is out of state and has not ever done anything to assist them. To not use that rule is insane, which is why I don't think the attny really did what she should have. I need to convey to him the facts. It's a mess, but hopefully resolvable, and I can't thank you enough for your idea. Maybe the problem is that mom may not have had a POA giving dad authority?? I think all that might exist is an old living will.
gdaughter, it's too bad that your Dad didn't have a POA document written up for your mom, naming you as secondary if something were to happen to him. That is how my mother's is written, I am the POA, but if something happens to me, then my daughter takes over.
No, attorney is right. Unless ur second on her POA you will need to get guardianship since she can't give u POA. Like I said, the cost can come out of Moms money.
I feel like I have been warned...but now am concerned. Mom has moderate dementia; Dad is per the attorney able to make decisions on her behalf...if dad should pass on, then the attny mentioned I would need to go to court to become her guardian, which sounds from these posts very expensive and challenging, though I am in Cuyahoga Cty OH. Since she can't sign off on anything since she isn't capable of understanding and giving consent, I don't think she can do a POA. Is it possible (the attny didn't mention this) that my dad could pass his authority over her to me??
I have no problem being POA. I am on Mom's account so I can pay bills. I agree u don't need guardianship. If u ever feel u need it, you can take it out of parents bank acct. Medicaid allows it.
I agree with Grandma1954. At all costs, I would try and keep the courts out of your life. It is expensive. It is intrusive. It is stressful. If you are the DPOA please always act in the best interests of your loved one. Keep your receipts on everything. Keep a separate account of all money for your loved one. Keep records of the care you are providing. You never know when someone will accuse you of stealing, abuse or worse. I am sorry to be so blunt but I have seen this happen to the most loving, honest and altruistic caregivers. Have a trackable system in place and be transparent will all family members. Then, try to capture and relish those loving moments with your loved one. And, take care of yourself in the process. Good luck.
When my friends filled out the forms making me their POA, they gave me power over everything--financial and health matters. So far, it is working well, but it is a lot of work. I make decisions I know they would agree with if their minds were normal and their memories worked. I pay everything by check from their account, so every expenditure is documented. I don't have to account to anyone, but act as though I do, just in case there would ever be a question about their money. It is much easier than being a guardian in this respect with not having to go to court and keep more records and have an attorney, but I am still being careful. I am also the executor of their estate and know what to do with any remaining money should there be some. That is not likely with the costs of their care.
It really depends on whether or not the person needs a guardian. Not everyone does but some do. Is your mom able to manage her own affairs? I don't know what kind of POA your position covers whether it's general or limited, you didn't say.
Being POA is a big responsibility like mentioned here but don't overstep your bounds and start taking advantage if you're handling money. Someone did this to my bio dad when he was living, having access to someone with lots of money is a huge temptation that really brings out the monsters in some types of people so be very careful if you happen to be handling any amount of money at all, especially large amounts. As mentioned here, keep the receipts and be ready to prove every purchase because you can't use a dime of that person's money for any other purpose except for that person and their needs. If caught using the money for any other purpose, the court will come down real hard on you and remove you as that person's POA. People really frown on mistakes but maybe not quite as bad as if someone defrauded someone they were supposed to be helping so be very careful. I'm trying to warn you because I'm dealing with something now where someone defrauded my dad and she was supposed to be helping him but ended up helping herself to everything he had. Don't fall into the same temptation. There's a saying to lead me not into temptation for I'll find it myself, and sadly so many people do and land in legal trouble for it. Don't do it, just don't. I'm speaking from experience because I'm right in the middle of a case as we speak and I didn't find out about the fraud until after my dad died because there were eight different cases against the POA over taxes with one of those cases being a foreclosure. Again, be very careful handling other peoples money. If I were to ever need a POA, I would set it up where they can't touch my money or asset titles but they would have other powers for small tasks. I already have online auto bill pay coming out which would pay the bills if I became can't touch my money or asset titles but they would have other powers for small tasks. I already have online auto bill pay coming out which would pay the bills if I became incapacitated. The bills would still continue coming out and going to the right people, all you do is set it up from your end and forget it, just set it and forget it. As bills fluctuate as some do, amounts can be adjusted by a few dollars. I think the reason why online auto bill pay came into existence is to give an avenue of independence and convenience for starters. It's an alternative to the risk of a POA or anyone else having access to your money. You don't necessarily need anyone to have access to your money if your bills are already being paid with online bill pay and everything is being paid that needs paid to keep the utilities on and a roof over your head. You can be away from home and definitely as long as the bills are coming out automatically. As long as there's a steady income to go with it, there's no need to worry. I also use auto transfer to another account I use for to another account I use for extras after the bills are automatically paid. That way, I have a small allowance on my card all the time and it'll build up if I become incapacitated but the bills will still come out and I'll still have a home to go to. Even if I went on a very long vacation, I'll still have a home to come to because of how everything is set up. This is why I really highly recommend setting everything up for yourself and not letting anyone have access to your money, you just can't trust no one these days. Anytime you let a POA or even a guardian or someone else come in and access your bank account, it's a huge loss risk because they can clean you out if you give them too much power. They don't call it "power" of attorney for nothing, it's actually a license to steal and it's wrong. This is why people setting up POA must exclude access to their bank accounts and other valuable assets because POA can actually take it too far if the POA happens to have money troubles and they become tempted because they have access to someone else's money. This is why if I had a POA I would definitely say no access to my money, don't touch my money! If I had a house, I would already have some kind of set up where no one could take it from me should I land in a nursing home. This is exactly what my dad did and I don't know for sure why they made the TOD account unavailable in 09. I'm not sure if it was eventually reinstated later or what they have to replace it, but I'm yet to find out because I'm in the middle of asset recovery and I'll need some legal protections in place just in case I do gain some property
I am in the state of ohio and I am full poa for my mom, I was worried that I had to become guardian. for her. A person from agency said that I had to, so I went to the probate court office and asked them with a copy of the poa and the secretary told me that I was fine with the poa that covered everything and that guardianship was very expensive and that I would have to drag my 89 yr mother to court also which I would not even consider doing to her. Everything has been fine so far. I have handled what I need to do for her. I would suggest going to your local probate court office with a copy of your poa and ask, it's worth a try... Good luck
There is also POA for Health Care does your POA cover both?
I guess my best answer would be you should see the lawyer that drew up the papers to begin with to answer this question. I can tell you being Guardian is not easy. It is expensive. You need to be bonded so that fee has to be paid. There will still be a Court appointed GAL (guardian at litem) and they get paid. And you will have to keep receipts from EVERYTHING you purchase for her and that will be reviewed by the court. You will be going to court, or your lawyer will be going for you every 6 months. (this is how it was for me in Cook County in Illinois) And this is the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what I had to do with/for my husband. Once the money runs out you will no longer be the Guardian of the Estate and of the Person you will be jut the Guardian of the Person so you will just have to mail in reports to the court. As you can see I may be a little biased when it comes to Guardianship. (particularly of a Spouse) I guess I should have started this with this statement.... If it is unnecessary for you to become Guardian don't do it. If you must to help her get the proper care that she needs then you have to do it.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Being POA is a big responsibility like mentioned here but don't overstep your bounds and start taking advantage if you're handling money. Someone did this to my bio dad when he was living, having access to someone with lots of money is a huge temptation that really brings out the monsters in some types of people so be very careful if you happen to be handling any amount of money at all, especially large amounts. As mentioned here, keep the receipts and be ready to prove every purchase because you can't use a dime of that person's money for any other purpose except for that person and their needs. If caught using the money for any other purpose, the court will come down real hard on you and remove you as that person's POA. People really frown on mistakes but maybe not quite as bad as if someone defrauded someone they were supposed to be helping so be very careful. I'm trying to warn you because I'm dealing with something now where someone defrauded my dad and she was supposed to be helping him but ended up helping herself to everything he had. Don't fall into the same temptation. There's a saying to lead me not into temptation for I'll find it myself, and sadly so many people do and land in legal trouble for it. Don't do it, just don't. I'm speaking from experience because I'm right in the middle of a case as we speak and I didn't find out about the fraud until after my dad died because there were eight different cases against the POA over taxes with one of those cases being a foreclosure. Again, be very careful handling other peoples money. If I were to ever need a POA, I would set it up where they can't touch my money or asset titles but they would have other powers for small tasks. I already have online auto bill pay coming out which would pay the bills if I became can't touch my money or asset titles but they would have other powers for small tasks. I already have online auto bill pay coming out which would pay the bills if I became incapacitated. The bills would still continue coming out and going to the right people, all you do is set it up from your end and forget it, just set it and forget it. As bills fluctuate as some do, amounts can be adjusted by a few dollars. I think the reason why online auto bill pay came into existence is to give an avenue of independence and convenience for starters. It's an alternative to the risk of a POA or anyone else having access to your money. You don't necessarily need anyone to have access to your money if your bills are already being paid with online bill pay and everything is being paid that needs paid to keep the utilities on and a roof over your head. You can be away from home and definitely as long as the bills are coming out automatically. As long as there's a steady income to go with it, there's no need to worry. I also use auto transfer to another account I use for to another account I use for extras after the bills are automatically paid. That way, I have a small allowance on my card all the time and it'll build up if I become incapacitated but the bills will still come out and I'll still have a home to go to. Even if I went on a very long vacation, I'll still have a home to come to because of how everything is set up. This is why I really highly recommend setting everything up for yourself and not letting anyone have access to your money, you just can't trust no one these days. Anytime you let a POA or even a guardian or someone else come in and access your bank account, it's a huge loss risk because they can clean you out if you give them too much power. They don't call it "power" of attorney for nothing, it's actually a license to steal and it's wrong. This is why people setting up POA must exclude access to their bank accounts and other valuable assets because POA can actually take it too far if the POA happens to have money troubles and they become tempted because they have access to someone else's money. This is why if I had a POA I would definitely say no access to my money, don't touch my money! If I had a house, I would already have some kind of set up where no one could take it from me should I land in a nursing home. This is exactly what my dad did and I don't know for sure why they made the TOD account unavailable in 09. I'm not sure if it was eventually reinstated later or what they have to replace it, but I'm yet to find out because I'm in the middle of asset recovery and I'll need some legal protections in place just in case I do gain some property
I guess my best answer would be you should see the lawyer that drew up the papers to begin with to answer this question.
I can tell you being Guardian is not easy.
It is expensive. You need to be bonded so that fee has to be paid. There will still be a Court appointed GAL (guardian at litem) and they get paid. And you will have to keep receipts from EVERYTHING you purchase for her and that will be reviewed by the court. You will be going to court, or your lawyer will be going for you every 6 months. (this is how it was for me in Cook County in Illinois) And this is the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what I had to do with/for my husband. Once the money runs out you will no longer be the Guardian of the Estate and of the Person you will be jut the Guardian of the Person so you will just have to mail in reports to the court.
As you can see I may be a little biased when it comes to Guardianship. (particularly of a Spouse)
I guess I should have started this with this statement....
If it is unnecessary for you to become Guardian don't do it. If you must to help her get the proper care that she needs then you have to do it.