My mother has severe Alzheimer's. She was in the moderate stages in August 2015 when I first got involved after she left the house and walked 1 mile into another neighborhood and fell breaking her heel. 2 days later, she fell when getting out of bed and broke her wrist. For months me and my step-siblings worked with her and my step-father to help them with household duties, accompanied them to doctor appointments, and taught my step-father to deal with my mother's incontinence (properly cleaning and changing her, etc.). My mother is 75 now, and he is 87. There is a lot to this entire story, but I am going to try to hit the highlights. We tried to get him to allow care into his home, but he refused. Sadly, he has plenty of money set aside to provide care for her, but he refuses to spend it. He was hospitalized in December 2015 and at that moment we seized the opportunity to admit mom into the Senior Behavioral unit at the same hospital for her own safety. Once he was released, the Senior Behavioral unit would not allow my mother to leave until she was going to be given 24/7 care, proven in the home or at a facility. I took my step-father to court and gained guardianship (of the person) over my mother. I placed her in a memory care unit at the beginning of January 2016. I only did this because he refused to provide the medical care at home, otherwise I had no issue with her remaining there with him. He hired a lawyer and by April 2016 he took me back to court, agreed to her needs, and convinced the court to give him guardianship for the sake of their wedding vows. I was fine with that as long as he provided the 24/7 care. As I feared, he got the 24/7 care and continued it for a couple of months, then reduced it to 6 hours/day, 3 days/week. I tried to leave it alone, but continually worried of her wandering again, or not being kept clean due to her incontinence. I ended up filing a motion to remove his guardianship and we had another hearing in February 2017. The result of that hearing was that I was granted limited guardianship for rights to access all medical and non-medical records on my mother at any time through a court issued letter. My step-father added 1 more day per week to the caregivers, and every other Sunday. I since gathered all of her medical and non-medical history, noted my concerns, and filed another hearing to remove his guardianship which was set for 5/11/2017. Today I received a notice from his attorney that he has filed a "motion to dismiss" the hearing stating many things about me including that I have used my access to medical records as the basis of a plan to harass the guardian, and that I have no proof of any harm to the Ward/my mother. He also states that my mother continues to do much better under the care of her husband in her own home than she did under any staffed institution to which I with to lock her away in. The letter has me furious. Is there a process for me to follow now, legally, to push this? What is my next step in this game I play with his attorney? He has the money to pay this attorney, and if he would just put this money toward my mothers care, in their home, I would leave it alone. Can someone provide some direction on my next steps? Thanks so much,
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Often times court assigned guardian's are the best for all involved. It removes the dysfunctional family relationships from the equation. The guardian is mom's, watching out for her health and welfare only. They have to try to remain impartial towards others involved. The only job is what is best for mom. Was the decreased level of care included in a court order? Did the court order 24/7 care by someone other that stepdad? If so SD is in contempt.
You could send the judge a letter stating your concerns. Why was the guardian court appointed in the first place? How did that happen?
Can you get a letter from her doctor stating 24/7 care from a pro is necessary?
My twisted sisters took me to court when I cared for mom for four years. They did not want her under my care, it started with an accusation of financial exploitation. HA! One twisted has mom's POA's and knew nothing of the sort was occurring. The court ordered I be paid to provide the care. Twisteds used about 120K of mom's funds taking me to court. They thought a facility would be cheaper. HA! Twisteds wore me down and I quit about Eight months after court decision. Then mom started paying the facility, $6,500 a month plus a private caregiver because of behaviors. So roughly 12-13k a month! I made a very small fraction of that!
Twisteds were more concerned about their inheritance, so spent so much for a court action? Families can get down right ugly and irrational.