Mom is 93 with Alzheimer’s. We interviewed an aide and think she can take care of mom. She’s been an aide for 15 years (from Philippines). She is a widow and would live in.
I am however concerned about the caregivers age and health (I don’t know if she’s healthy or not). She is obese. If it weren’t for these two things I’d be okay with her. What is your opinion? Any experience with aides this age?
But what's been very valuable is the social aspect. I don't mind if she sits & has a cuppa & they enjoy some tv. She has become quite a friend.
I'd agree to getting references. You want kindness & absolutely no rough manner or handling. With any new aides, always be viligent of any whiff of abuse: bruising, withdrawal or pain (eg aide taking half the pain meds leaving client in pain). Good luck.
Best of luck!
It slightly depends on what you want her to do, but I wouldn't be worried about the age, and I wouldn't be worried about her size unless it prevents her from being normally mobile (which you can observe as she moves around the place). But as for a caregiver needing to be at peak fitness - anything beyond standard adult female strength you'd need lifting and mobility aides anyway, and it wouldn't matter if this lady were thirty and sylph-like.
The thing is, you could be passing up an absolute gem and genius of a caregiver, with fifteen years' satisfaction behind her, for the sake of mere assumptions.
There are horror stories on this forum about live ins. One took over. One wouldn't leave the house after the client died. Another moved her family in putting the client in the cellar apartment that the aide was living in and taking over the rest of the house. Another, once the client died, told the son she could live in the house but he would still need to keep it up.
If u go this route, get a lawyer involved. Have a contract drawn up naming all the reasons you can let her go. Distinguish if she is self employed or ur employee. ( depends on ur State laws concerning live in help) This will determine what tax deductions u will need to make.
If you go this direction, make sure all valuables are out of the house.
If it were me, I would put Mom in an AL. She will be safe, fed and cared for. You won't have to worry about needing aides. You do realize that ur going to need more than one aide. This woman can't expect to work 24/7 with no time for herself.
I do think Geaton makes good points below no matter WHO you are hiring; I was not aware that a hired worker can be considered a legal resident of your home, and find it worry.
I would also say if you are hiring people of any kind in your home, your liability insurance umbrella needs to be a good one, and this is worth discussion with your insurance agent. Liability insurance is often very cheap for what you get, and can be raised several 100,000 for a pittance. My Dad was always a believer in get great insurance and hope someone ELSE has to use the money you put in, not you.
Another problem to consider is that care workers who are expected to be "on call" 24/7 are now suing in court for wages, saying they are not paid minimum wage hourly and expected to be on call 24/7. This is a legal no no and they are winning in court cases, so care should be taken in this wise.
Seems so many problems all the time to negotiate in this world, but looking on their side you can understand.