She is almost 85, and unreasonable. She gets angry quickly, occasionally becomes violent, and makes unreasonable demands on us. We believe she is living in the past (about 65 years ago). Hallucinates/thinks someone is living inside the wall, spying on her. She has been known to wander, and now she is demanding to get a one-way flight ticket to Puerto Rico, and has not contacted anyone there. All her family over there has died. What can we do?
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I have put aside my life and smiles for a father who lives and behaves exactly as your Mom does.He's 90 and he often yells at me .. in front of people ... says a good amount of demeaning things about the family " he never wanted " . Dementia is a tough unpredictable road to travel... without support it can make us doubt ourselves and makes us very sad...
Please make sure Rita..that you have friends who truly understand .
Most of mine..don't.
Getting out in nature helps. Excersise... excersise. !! art and music..Good healthy food.. for both of you is key . I"ll do the same...I don't get to sleep through the night much... I pray your family does... xo From San Francisco ca
My Mom suffers from dementia, depression and is very angry. My siblings and I need help with her. Advice?
We believe she is living in the past (about 65 years ago). Hallucinates/thinks someone is living inside the wall, spying on her. She has been known to wander, and now she is demanding to get a one-way flight ticket to Puerto Rico, and has not contacted anyone there. All her family over there has died.
Then you said
The reason is because she still is mentally functioning well-enough to fend for herself.
Erm Hello? NO SHE IS NOT - she needs help and she needs it yesterday
If that was a bit blunt sorry but it was meant to be
We know her health is failing, but just what exactly do you want us to do? None of us can afford to properly care for her. We cannot force her. So, instead of arguing the point that she is not well, tell us something we do not know. We do not find it difficult to let go of being her child. We know the dangers, but nobody has the solution here. There have also been many times when we each told he flat out- NO! We have taken the time to explain to her why we tell her No. So you see, we do not always give in to her tantrums, etc. Now she/our mother is over there in P.R., with her nephews and nieces, trying to find a place for her to live. YES, they have noticed her problem. Believe me when I state that she has no other option or anyplace to go, except back here/to us. She has literally been removed from homes of relatives due to her behavior, etc. TWICE! She has run out of options and no place to go but to return here. To US. Yes, we are aware that we may run into problems with the authorities because of her. WHAT DO YOU WANT US TO DO? I will talk to my father on this matter. He and his siblings had to care for our grandmother. His and their mother until death. His input will be of help to me.
Please go get your Mom and fly back with her..Take her to her Dr and have her evaluted...She needs your help more now than ever...
Please keep us updated..Good luck dealing with this difficult decision...