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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Is there a checklist or a list of to-do's including what to pack; decorating her room and so on? Any tips welcome. We are in the process of selecting a facility.
If you have been helping her to get dressed including putting on watch and jewelry, try to edit all items over the next few days or weeks to those that are super easy to put on; label these and these are what goes over with her to start with. Like get a elastic bracelet type of watch, switch to longer necklaces and clip ER. If she has jewelry that is valuable, do NOT let any of those pieces go over with her. If she fusses, get replica jewelry.
Find out if this place does NOT allow ladies to come to the dining room in a “house dress”. A lot of places - esp if private pay - will enforce this. They can wear pj or house dresses in their room but not to meals or activities. Try to notice how the other ladies dress so her wardrobe is in line with what others do. It may be that since you are not there to help her get fully dressed, she needs to get an “adaptive” wardrobe. Yes the facility should help them get dressed, but if she can do some of this on her own, it would be a good thing. Silverts sells adaptive clothing.
Get into her room the day before and set it up. Freqflyer advice is 100&1% spot on. My mom had a lamp that she loved, it went from home, to IL to 2 different NHs. & I bought small lightweight easy adhesive shelves, placed above door transom’s and put trio of battery operated candles on timers that were staggered, so there would always be some soft light in the room, the hallway, bathroom. It had a calming effect as it can be spooky for them in unfamiliar places.
The facility should have a beauty shoppe. They are independently run so wf needs to have an account. The facility should have an in house “trust” or petty cash accounts for residents to draw from. You just set it up to pay beauty shoppe & add $ as needed. Personally I’d go and make it a point to meet the beautiful shoppe staff and set up a schedule. Try to have her see her old beautician day before she moves in so that when she goes they can see how it’s usually set.
There will be an activities director. If it were me & I was looking at various facilities, I would want to see what the activities calendar looks like AND IF what this place does are things your wife would have some degree of interest in AND does activities that allow for spouses & family to be a part of. My moms first NH was lousy on activities, like it was a movie or sitting / listening to live music; Moms 2nd NH was active as they did holiday events, arts & crafts, outdoor gardening and field trips (these required each resident to have a family member meet the Nh group - they came in NH van-at the restaurant or location, it was awesome). If your wf is still pretty ambulatory & still social, a good activities Dept and staff will make a huge difference.
If she likes mail, get her large print magazine subscriptions.
And you will likely be suggested to NOT come to visit every day. Try to limit visits at the beginning so that she can start to flow with the schedule the place has set up for their residents. Good luck!
gabucks, if possible, try to arrange your wife's room the same as her bedroom at home. I know it might not be easy, but I found that helped for my Dad when he moved to senior living. Had the night stand in the same location, the dresser, the night lights. That way when he awoke in the middle of the night, the room wouldn't feel strange.
Also, if Memory Care allows this, use the same bedspread from home. Seeing that bedspread your wife hopefully will know that is it her's.
My Dad loved sunlight, so I was lucky to find a south facing room for him. Dad loved his books, so he brought all of them with him along with the bookcases. Thankfully all the bookcases fit. His books were like a peaceful cocoon for him.
Try not to bring any expensive jewelry as it can become misplaced. If your wife insists, I would buy her new inexpensive jewelry to replace the expensive ones.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
In the confusion of packing, it’s sometimes hard to get things labeled.
Many posters here have expressed that their loved ones ended up missing clothing, as well.
As you label an item, enter it onto an inventory. You can have the facility sign off on this inventory after admission.
You could also add pictures of each item, if you have extra time to be thorough.
Find out if this place does NOT allow ladies to come to the dining room in a “house dress”. A lot of places - esp if private pay - will enforce this. They can wear pj or house dresses in their room but not to meals or activities. Try to notice how the other ladies dress so her wardrobe is in line with what others do. It may be that since you are not there to help her get fully dressed, she needs to get an “adaptive” wardrobe. Yes the facility should help them get dressed, but if she can do some of this on her own, it would be a good thing. Silverts sells adaptive clothing.
Get into her room the day before and set it up. Freqflyer advice is 100&1% spot on. My mom had a lamp that she loved, it went from home, to IL to 2 different NHs. & I bought small lightweight easy adhesive shelves, placed above door transom’s and put trio of battery operated candles on timers that were staggered, so there would always be some soft light in the room, the hallway, bathroom. It had a calming effect as it can be spooky for them in unfamiliar places.
The facility should have a beauty shoppe. They are independently run so wf needs to have an account. The facility should have an in house “trust” or petty cash accounts for residents to draw from. You just set it up to pay beauty shoppe & add $ as needed. Personally I’d go and make it a point to meet the beautiful shoppe staff and set up a schedule. Try to have her see her old beautician day before she moves in so that when she goes they can see how it’s usually set.
There will be an activities director. If it were me & I was looking at various facilities, I would want to see what the activities calendar looks like AND IF what this place does are things your wife would have some degree of interest in AND does activities that allow for spouses & family to be a part of. My moms first NH was lousy on activities, like it was a movie or sitting / listening to live music; Moms 2nd NH was active as they did holiday events, arts & crafts, outdoor gardening and field trips (these required each resident to have a family member meet the Nh group - they came in NH van-at the restaurant or location, it was awesome). If your wf is still pretty ambulatory & still social, a good activities Dept and staff will make a huge difference.
If she likes mail, get her large print magazine subscriptions.
And you will likely be suggested to NOT come to visit every day. Try to limit visits at the beginning so that she can start to flow with the schedule the place has set up for their residents. Good luck!
Also, if Memory Care allows this, use the same bedspread from home. Seeing that bedspread your wife hopefully will know that is it her's.
My Dad loved sunlight, so I was lucky to find a south facing room for him. Dad loved his books, so he brought all of them with him along with the bookcases. Thankfully all the bookcases fit. His books were like a peaceful cocoon for him.
Try not to bring any expensive jewelry as it can become misplaced. If your wife insists, I would buy her new inexpensive jewelry to replace the expensive ones.