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If you're named in someone’s will to be their POA, but your health changes and isn’t good enough to fulfill that obligation you promised, what happens? I got diagnosed with a brain tumor and I can not help my elderly parent. What do I do?

You let your parent(s) know that you cannot fulfill your duties in this position and they need to find someone else (or you find someone else)
* Put your notification in writing.
* Mail it if necessary (certified mail with return receipt)
* Contact another involved if your parent(s) is unable to address this need / is not responsive to you/r need-request.
* Hire an outside person to manage: Guardian ? Conservator ? There are professional people that handle these needs if there are no other family or friends able to take on this responsibility.
- Call / find an attorney who can do this (or they have staff that can).

My heart goes out to you with your brain tumor diagnosis; I hope it is resolved and that you heal completely.

Gena / Touch Matters
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Reply to TouchMatters
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you can resign POA. best to consult an attorney
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Reply to strugglinson
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If your parent is currently competent now is the time to let them know you cannot fulfill POA and to appoint someone else or to get the a legal paid Fiduciary.

If your parent is incompetent, then not to worry. At the time they need a POA (which ONLY happens while they are living) you would contact an attorney and say you cannot serve. At that point the state would be appointed guardian. If another family member wished to assume POA for this living but incompetent elder the attorney would help in getting temporary guardianship for them.

As to after your parent's death, it is the executor who matters; POA is over with at the point of death. If the executor cannot serve the court will appoint another. But if you can do all this now with a competent parent, see an attorney with your parent and take care of business. So sorry to hear about your diagnosis and wish you the best of luck.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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A POA can be named while a Will is being drawn up but a POA is not listed in the Will. The Will is in effect AFTER the person dies and at that point they no longer need a POA.
If the person that has named you POA (I am going with that assumption for now) is cognizant you tell them that you can no longer fulfill the role as POA and they can name another trusted person to fulfill that role.
If the person is not cognizant you need to find out how to step down/resign from that role. You could talk to the lawyer that drew up the POA forms.
If you mean that you have been named as executor of the Will when the time comes and you feel that you can not do that inform Probate Court.

Now for you personally...
You do need to take care of your own health first and foremost.
I wish you well in your treatment and recovery.
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Reply to Grandma1954
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As said, you can't name someone POA in a Will. POAs are revoked upon death. If you are mentioned in the Will as an Executor, you do not have to take on the position. You tell Probate you cannot take on the responsibility. Then another family member can become Executor.

You should have a copy of the POA assigning you. If not Aunt should have it. This should tell you who the lawyer was who wrote the POA. You contact him and tell him you need to step down. As said though, this leaves Aunt with no POA and not able to assign another. That means a family member gets guardianship ir the State takes over her care.

POA does not mean you physically care for someone, you just take care of their finances and make sure their wishes for their healthcare are carried out.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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You will need to check with your state to see what the resignation protocol is. Then do it.

What are you currently doing for your parent? Are you providing hands-on caregiving? Or just management? If so, how much?

What is your parent's current living arrangement? Do they live with you or on their own and you check in on them?

I'm so sorry about your diagnosis. I wish you all the best in your treatment. Please provide more information so that we can give you the best guidance.
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Reply to Geaton777
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Sorry to hear about your health issues. I actually have a question for you: you mentioned “named in the will as POA“ but one of those things is not right. The will comes in to play when someone dies, and names an executor for the estate. The POA is given before someone dies, and ends on their death.

You mention being unable to care for your elderly parent, So I think you’re talking about a POA. If I have that right, then one additional comment: the POA doesn’t require you to care for the parent. Just gives you the ability to make financial or healthcare decisions on their behalf. It doesn’t require you to do the actual caregiving.

Apologies if you already know this, but wanted to make sure these basics are covered. Everything sort of depends on these two points.

To answer your original question, as far as I know no one can be forced to act as the POA if they don’t want to or can’t. You should tell the parent immediately so they have the chance to assign another power of attorney To make decisions on their behalf,, if they still can.

Other people on this thread can perhaps weigh in on any formal steps to shut the POA down, I’ve seen different opinions about how this is done and how important it is but I do believe that if you can’t serve as the POA you will not have to legally.

Edit: I see in the original question of the person has dementia. That means they may not be able to reassign the POA. If you can’t stay the POA, then it would be as if they didn’t have one at all, and there needs to be thought towards guardianship. This is a whole different topic.
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Reply to Rumbletown
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