My great uncle served in the Vietnam war and then got married to his wife of 50+years. When I went to visit him last his wife was all out of sorts suffering from major dementia. I do not know if she has been diagnosed but she doesn't remember my uncle on bad days. He is considering assisted living but has two concerns, first the money and second his wife can be violent when she is confused and he is worried about staff members getting rough with her. What are the options when it comes to Veterans spouses and assisted living?
The VA has benefits for spouses that is largely dependant on physical and financial need. Maybe she is eligible for Medicaid. Uncle can keep the house and a car. Have uncle call the area Agency on Aging as welp, they are a wealth of information.
Next time she gets aggressive she should be taken to the ER for evaluation and possible geriatric psych evaluation.
If she is becoming violent, she needs to be seen asap, preferably by a geriatric psychiatrist who can work with medication to calm her agitation. If she becomes violent towards him, her should not hesitate to call 911 to have her taken to the ER.
There is a Veteran's Benefits tab on this site. It's a good place to start doing research about eligibility. But before thinking about placement, he needs to get her the specialized medical help she needs right now.