Mom is in a facility so we don't see what happens when we aren't there. She is fine during the day but at night, her personality changes, from what I am told. She doesn't have a mean bone in her body. But this dementia, or the people who have worse memory issues than she does, is either making her worse or something. I was told that she could have sundowners. She doesn't wear her glasses, which is fine. Now she won't wear her hearing aids again. They are new. I don't think that the employees know how to deal with people like her. Although, I do like one of them. One of the care givers tonight when I stopped over, told me that she hit one of the caregivers when she either tried to give her the morning meds or tried to put on her hearing aids. She doesn't have any problems with me. Does anyone else deal with situations like this? I would love for her to live with us but I think that I would be in for a larger responsibility than I can handle.
Mom had cataract surgery years ago, releasing her from lifelong glasses, except for mild readers. She is also being treated for Mac Deg, many years now and my plan is to continue this until she loses sight or regresses too much. She also wears a hearing aid, so losing her sight would be disastrous!
Funny that our mother ALWAYS wears the glasses, even though they are only for reading. That is likely because she wore glasses for so long, much longer than not (and long term memories stick around longer!) She constantly "cleans" them too, insisting they are dirty, or she needs a new Rx for them! They aren't intended for long distance, but I let it go. They are only about 1.5 (tried stronger, hated them!) Depending on your mom's eyesight, I wouldn't stress over the glasses too much - if they are for distance, it isn't like she needs to read those upcoming road signs!
The hearing aid(s) are another issue. When mom moved in, she had one that she would wear and another we kept for spare (she lost one and we got another when she was living alone, then YB found the other when we started clearing out her place.) When she moved in, we noted the hearing aid, but didn't request any help - she was okay doing it herself. Too often when I would get there, it would be dead battery, not working. So I gave them batteries and suggested what the provider told me - change it every two weeks. Didn't happen, as best I can tell. I would find her wearing it with a dead battery, or would have to search her room to find it, sometimes battery ok, sometimes not.
Earlier this year I get notified that it went through the laundry with her sheets. I really expected it to happen much sooner. Took me some time to find another provider (previous did not respond to messages.) The new ones are chargeable, so I gave the charger to the nurse as mom would lose it or throw it away. I left it to them to take it at night, charge it and give it back in the morning. Maybe 2 months go by and new email telling me it is MIA. They have no idea what happened to it. GRRRREAT! We did order a pair, just molded for the one side (other side is NFG), so I had to get provider over to set the second one up. Hopefully they keep better watch over it now (the first 2 years she was better about wearing it, but later would question it, say she doesn't wear one, etc.) They will NOT reimburse - the new ones come with loss protection, we'd only have to cough up $400, but they refuse. I didn't complain about the first loss, but seriously, I left THEM in charge of the new one!
Two suggestions - esp for the hearing aids:
When needing to put the aid in, she needs to be aware. You probably interact with her out of habit, but some people don't understand. When the provider came to fit the new one, he started to put it in and she recoiled and batted him away! They really need to approach her from the front (she might not hear or be aware of them from behind or the side), make sure she understands what they are doing and go from there. They have been taking mom's away when she keeps taking it out, to help prevent loss (she will wrap it in napkin or tissue.)
For the glasses, might she accept either an eyeglass cord, those ones that allow the glasses to hang on your chest, or some kind of clip or jewelry to hang them on so she will have them but doesn't need to wear them all the time? They do make nice ones (eyeglass jewelry and/or brooch.) I hang my readers over a necklace I am wearing most of the time, sometimes over the edge of a shirt or sweater, but they can fall!