I live in FL. My stepmother lives in Folsom, CA. She cannot or will not move to be near me. She has no other family and few friends who can help. She tells me she needs help with some daily living and housecleaning, but is nervous and reluctant to allow help in her home. She can't maintain the house any longer and will need to move to independent living with a future step up to assisted living. She also really needs someone to do medical case management for her right now. Thanks.
Good luck as you begin this long road. It sure would be easier if she would agree to move near you, but as long as she is competent it is her decision. Does she have all her documents in order? Powers of Attorney and such?
Is your step mom active in a house of worship? Sometimes other members of the congregation have used agencies thaey may be able to recommend
There are so-o many threads like this, I hope all of the posters (me included) are noting that aging may require moving --- to a different (easier) arrangement, to locations where family is closer, etc.