I'm going nuts staying in the house everyday. Day in and day out. My mother is 90 with dementia but can still feed, dress and shower herself. But still needs me around. Well, I'm thinking about putting her in some kind of home. Anywhere, just out of my house. So now I need a job. Ok, so I had an interview the other day and it went down the tubes almost from the beginning. My social skills are nil since I've been home with Mom for 2 1/2 yrs. And out of a job for 4 1/2. So trying to explain what I did at my last job 4 yrs. ago didn't go well. And the stupid questions they asked me I couldn't answer. Could being around someone with dementia, you catch it too? It sure feels like it. I don't know if I will ever be able to get a job again and I won't be able to collect SS until I'm 62, 2 1/12 more yrs. That's if they don't raise it to 63 like they are talking about doing. Maybe a Fast Food Restaurant will hire me. Oh, but I don't have any experience except 40 yrs. of being married and raising a family. It feels like my life is over and I'm only 59. Does anyone else feel this way or going through the same thing? I know I'm not alone. Hugs to all.
I had to give up my job, too, my mom just declined that much to where she couldn't be left alone. It's a road of hard choices and decisions.
I bought myself a little camera, and I find I really enjoy taking pictures, inside outside...I've taken so many they've piled up. lol It's just something I find relaxing. You need ME time, every care giver does. Take it. Somehow, someway.
And no, please, not just 'anywhere'. I know your frustration, but I'm sure you'd want your mom in clean, safe surroundings.
Life isn't over, either. *hugs*
It sounds to me like Suzi has the time to do something, and I think she should, and soon. The uncertain months could be well spent getting sharpening work skills online until a solution for mom was found... I feel so out of the loop of the world right now, so far behind, it's not even funny. I don't own a cell, and have no clue how to use my son's. That's bad, isn't it? lol I've been researching things online, things like job interview tips, do's and don't's, things like that. It's an eye opener to read what all is required of you in the real world. I haven't been part of that world in 10 years. It's pretty scary. I just keep reading and trying to gain something that way, for later on, when life is settled and I can move on with it.
Suzi, I do hope you find a solution that will satisfy everyone and start getting some much needed relaxation and me time...God knows we all need it. **sending good karma**
I agree totally with the volunteer work. That's a great idea
Good Luck with your search for the meaning of life while being a caregiver. Hugs. "StandAlone" I'll remember that answer - good answer.
As a recovering Catholic (and I don't mean drugs & alcohol), I kept hearing the ubiquitous "the Lord will provide ... the Lord will provide ... leave it in the hands of the Lord," etc., etc., etc. I did. No cigar. After all, aren't you supposed to help yourself first; just like NYC public assistance expects you to do. Anyway, let me get off the religious angle. Individuals need religion to be good people; others don't. We have to respect that.
Baby you don't just need a job. You need to resume, reinvent, or resurrect your life after so many years of caring for others. (By the way, and except your Mom, where are they now?) The online classes are good idea, but you also need to get out of the house for sanity's sake.
So for the moment you have 2 clear choices: put your Mom in a facility so you can have a life; or remain in prison until Social Security comes along to make the cruel and unusual punishment you're going through a bit more bearable.
(1) While caring for my mother, I kept hearing ...;
(2) public assistance expects you to do?; and
(3) Some individuals need religion ...