My Mother is 86 and a former Sunday School teacher. She has always held herself in high accord. She gets her oldest son and her nephew to buy her hard liquor and her shelves are well stocked. She can go through a case in 2 weeks. I have spoken to both boys about the situation but they are afraid she will go through withdrawal if she doesn't get her liquor. Her behavior is awful. She curses and tells us we are worthless and is constantly falling and then saying she stumbled over a shoe or opened the door on her knee. We know it is the alcohol. And these doctors!!!! We took her to the Dr. and tried to get him aside to tell him our concern and he announces to her that the children say you have memory problems and are abusing alcohol. Well, being sober during the Dr. visit she denied both claims so she got a clean bill of health and home we went. Now she vows never to let any of us take her to a Doctor ever again. We felt betrayed when he could have easily asked her a few questions and found the answers we were hoping for - surely there was alcohol still in her blood from the night before! Surely he saw the scrapes down her leg where she fell! After the visit she is angrier and drunker than ever. She lives alone but not for sure, I am afraid. We are at our wits end. Sorry for rambling.......
Can your son and nephew start buying less and less alcohol? Would your mom know the difference?
You can't make your mom quit drinking but maybe checking out Alanon would help you get some distance from the situation. Your mom's dysfunctional but you don't have to be a part of that. Alcoholism is a family disease. A disease that you are suffering from. Your mom may not be able to get well but you can.
You say she is an alcoholic, but she still is competent, right? That's really tough. Withdrawal is very dangerous. I think it needs to be done under medical supervision. Of course, ideally, she would agree to go to a facility that could monitor her withdrawal and then help her with rehab, but if she refuses, I'm not sure what your options might be. I'm not aware of any way to force her into rehab. You might consult with an attorney in your jurisdiction to see what options they may come up with, like involuntary commitment. Maybe, someone with experience in doing that will post here with their experience.
As for the alcohol: a bottle a day indicates a habit that has stood for many years. There is always going to be alcohol in her system at this point. Were she to suddenly stop cold turkey it would kill her. Honest. Look it up.
LOVE dirty chatter .