I have been on this wonderful forum a few times, and so baby of you gave been such blessings. I gave both parents who remain at home, and are ill: one with progressive supra nuclear palsy and wheelchair bound, the other with MS. They have a few good neighbors and an aid ( finally) that only dues s few tasks around the house. They live almost 2 hours away..... We have been trying for over 3 years to do medical appointments, and care on weekends.... Grocery shopping and the like. They could really use a full time person, but do not want that.
I was just diagnosed with breast cancer. We are still reeling from the diagnosis....we see all the doctors involved in the 17th to discuss how treatment will proceed.
I am so worried I will not be in place to help care for them....
They obviously need either in house care or a facility. Hopefully the doctor will be blunt. If they refuse to accept help, knowing the stress that will put on you, it would tell me they are not using good judgment. But, I would focus on your own heath. Try to let go of their situation and think healing thoughts. Anxiety is terrible for the body. You need rest, peace and calm. See what you doctor can prescribe to help you through this. I'm sorry about your diagnosis. I wish you all the best in your recovery.
I know msny others here suffer with so much day to day.... But we did try to get them years ago to move closer. They refused.
They fought me for yearsvhustbto get someone else in to do some light house cleaning , cooking, etc. I have an aunt who lives states away that mentioned to them one time, 'what will happen if Yoyr daughter runs herself in the ground and is bit in place any more?'
The anxiety about them even before the cancer diagnosis was ongoing- now it is frightening.
Perhaps a frank discussion with their doctor will help. If the doctor knows your situation and what you CANNOT do, and he knows their conditions and what they cannot do, then, maybe he will file with the Adult Protective Services.Depending on the laws in their state, they will do an investigation and if they find grounds, appoint a guardian. Since you can't do it, they will appoint someone from their list of approved people. The guardian will then make the decisions regarding their care, housing, etc. I might even ask their doctor to do it. I would stay back and let them resolve it. You can visit them, when your health permits.