Laughing, crying, angry! What; relieved and joy?
Just WOW! There is not much room here to truly express my gratitude towards the support, the "2cents worth" opinions, advice or whatever: But, Thank You!... A few times, I know I was pretty much out there! some off the wall ?stuff? well, Thank you for NOT expecting an apology and THANK YOU so MUCH!!! for the patience, understanding and OMG! the communications!... My intention,? sharing, in hopes to set another free?.. Please bare with me and thank you for your time,. the headline, above, "laughing, crying, angry, etc...." a series of events over a space of time. Briefly, first few years being neighbors, "laughing" hanging out meeting families... crying, family members passing away, leaving, debts, stress,... bargains, making deals, hurting, desperate, manipulating; games, head games, guilt games... At times even a bit vicious! I had even posted a question about... And Thank You so MUCH again to ALL of you!; responding in such a way that this day I can have nothing but gratitude! That little picture icon on my ?... well that's me laughing with joy and relief and crying with wow, joy and relief! Back to the "headline" after the bargains, (I know there is a lot of this story left out and it is hard) back to anger again cause of feeling "trapped", obligated?, (is this the mirror image of me? EEEWE!) I know many or at least some, may know what this is about... Something has ?SHIFTED? this past week! (must have been this site with you AWESOME people!) Now, I will say right up front, the good 'ol King James Bible, and I Well... anyway I am sure you have heard the old saying about making a choice at the "fork in the road" (please bare with me cause this is hard for me, (lol and I thought of writing a book, ha?) back to this week and WOW? a break through? It comes down to he, (my 93 year old neighbor) and I are so alone, (some family but none visit him and mine on a rare occasion). alone?, at 50+ I can get out a bit and but... There has been so much!...(for now I just can not give out details) GEEEEZE! But like I said, something has happened, I didn't see "him" anymore, I saw myself 40 years from now, a mirror image of myself, scared, ornery. alone... I had the honor and privilege to look him in the eyes, take him in my arms, and with that "unconditional love" ,,, I, lol, (with a tear right now), (Dang, I've got maybe about 40 years or 40 days to fix this? (I guess I can at least tell you a whole lot of alcohol involved and I don't want it any more but!) I felt; RELIEFE? ?FORGIVEN? FREE? What I do know for sure! GOD, "the universe" this site with all you amazing people, caring, sharing and ACCEPTING and helping without reserve is just WHEW!!!!! Bringing us back to scripture, I too have ("lost") so many loved ones so fast in just the past few years. The revelation, wow, (in fact, part of my anger issue lol a parallel type, to the Moses leading the people, my neighbor leading his family, and the promise land with all the fortunes, and LOL we left bare.... anyway) (I HOPE with all my heart to share back with you some comfort, healing and maybe I hope some JOY cause GOD knows you sure do deserve it!) Boy, sorry, back to the revelation? Scripture has it when Moses lead the people out of "bondage", the people made it to the promised land, Moses (or leaders of family to day) was not noted as ever making it over to the "promised land". The movies or stories about being left behind, the rapture? If you have ever been on a huge family camping trip? been on the trail following cherry picking season from mid CA up through WA? Well, when its time to break camp, there is a first part of camp that goes out first, scouts and such, they go ahead to setup the next campsite, the other part of the camp that is behind, LOL finishes up any last details, cleans up the camp site as good as or better off than when first set up camp (our, my loved ones are not lost, they have gone ahead or "passed on" to set up the next camp,) The ones who went out first, left "foot prints" in the sand for us to follow, and those who come in last will become first, and the MORE we honor, respect and love each other is the more we ............. generation to generation..... Well This was not easy (putting my thoughts) and I know there is such a big part of the story left out, but Thank you for taking the time, and thank You so MUCH for BEING YOU!