My grandmother started Monday making gurgling sounds. She began getting choked on yogurt. The Hospice nurse said that her lungs were clear, so she had not aspirated. Tuesday she stopped making the gurgling sounds but Wednesday her heels of her feet were black and it went up to her kness. Her feet were extremely cold. The whole family was called in and we thought she would pass. By time the nurse came that afternoon, the mottling was almost completely gone and her feet were warming back up. I do not understand what is happening. A few months ago, they could not get a pulse and she had started mottling then too. But she carried on. She has not had a bowel movement in over a week and since Monday morning her kidneys have moved only 3 times. She is still eating between 6 - 9 ounces of yogurt a day and drinking juices with Thick it. I feel like I have been on a roller coaster and I worry about her all of the time. Its not that I want my grandma to die, but she just lays there with no life at all. I just want her to be at peace with God in heaven. I dont think she is in much pain but I feel so bad that all she can do is lie there. The nurses tell us "It's just part of the process" I know that no one can tell me when, but I would like to know more of what to expect. What typically happens? I need answers and have searched everywhere. My family is wore out and just trying to hold on. Could someone just let me know typically how long does a person live after these signs?
Here are 3 good guides for you & your family to reference:
The Hospice Foundation of America: The Dying Process: A Guide for Caregivers;
Barbara Karnes: Gone From My Sight: The Dying Experience
&
Sherwin Nuland, M.D.: How We Die
Remember "hearing" is the last ability to go.
5 years ago my father(61) was having some issues but nothing actually life ending. For 2 days he was making that rattling sound and was tired. I suggested him to go to ER. They gave him a clean bill of health other than his previous issues. ER DR said he was having a panic attack???? Hearing that familiar sound I knew something else was going on. Less than 24hrs later, he left this world suddenly in his sleep with a smile on his face. That gave us reassurance that he went in peace. Its hard to watch someone slip away in front of you. Its makes you feel helpless that you need to do more. Make every moment count! It will help when the time comes.
Any comments?? I would appreciate any input. Thanks.
someone in the " shutting ' down stages of death isnt usually seeking advice on a forum. you may have pneumonia or something.
ox - I have no idea what's your problem. Acid reflux? When you're lying down, the acid is backflowing and making "hungry" noises?