My mom is 44 years old and she is depressed. She and my little sister live by themselves. In February she quit her job and they currently have no income at all. She has been living off of her tax refund. She was supposed to use this money to buy a car, (she had been walking to her place of work because it was close by) but instead she used it all on bills and now she doesn't even have enough to buy a car. She is almost broke and will soon have no money to pay her bills. She doesn't even want to try. She lays in her bed all day and refuses to put job applications in anywhere. I recommended that she try signing up on disability but she wouldn't do that. She won't leave the house. Won't even go grocery shopping. I don't know how to help her. If she doesn't do something, and soon, she's not gonna have the money to pay her bills even.
I want to help her but I don't know how. I have very little income, a part-time job, and I barely scrape by myself every month. I live in an apartment building that is strict on how many people stay with you, so it's not like I can move her in. I have no idea how to help her, or make her want to help herself. She won't even try anymore.
Nancy
One problem is that persons with severe depression seldom take the initiative. That may be the role you have to take for her. If any of you are on a program where you have a case worker, start with that person. He or she should be able to direct you to appropriate mental health resources. If there is no case worker yet, Google Mental Health Services for your state to find options close to you.
Treating depression is not a do-it-yourself project. But once Mom has a treatment plan you can be supportive in encouraging her/helping her to take her medications as directed and to attend her appointments.
It is very loving of you to be so concerned. I think once you bring some professional help into the picture things will begin to improve.
IF she is suicidal or hearing voices this becomes more urgent, and the crisis line can refer you to the appropriate local resource.
IF she has a primary care doctor and refuses mental health, and is not suicidal, have her talk with her doctor (to see if there is anything medically wrong) but also email the doctor and advise him that your mom is so depressed she quit work.
Somewhere in this see if she can get on disability. That means some doctor needs to sign that her depression prevents her from working.
See if she can get on a list for low income housing, it takes years to make it into a low income apartment.
Watch her to be sure that she does not become suicidal. Depression is progressive and irrational. Your world view becomes increasingly limited, like sinking to the bottom of a well, the opening is smaller and smaller, the way up seems increasingly impossible. All not based on reality, but on an increasingly limited ability to generate hopeful thoughts.
Keep her involved in stuff, dinner at McDonalds, video nights at home. Window shopping at the mall.
Good Luck. Your crisis line can be a big help. (I used to work on a couple)