I guess I'm not alone with this problem. I'm the one with all the responsibility for the well being of my parents. I too feel like an only child. I have a brother and sister-but their backs are turned and here I am. My husband has had to hear my venting - sooo I think I have found the perfect place !!! My Mom has MS and my Dad has some dementia going on. I recently was able to get them into an Assisted Living. (Had to do this alone-very hard on me). I am mad at my brother and sister for leaving this up to me. My sister lives far - but doesn't work. She came recently for a few days and left. She is like in the Bible: Has already recieved her reward. She makes sure to toot her horn always. My brother is worried about what he is going to get, rather than helping out. I don't want anything to do with them - never thought I would feel this way. I have become bitter. What hurts the most - my mom favors my sister over me.
It would be nice if your brother could stir his imagination to think that his mother might like to feel included. Especially as it's not like it'd put him to any trouble, seeing as she'd say no anyhow. But she'd feel happier, and he'd get that nice fuzzy feeling. You'd have thought.
Or apparently not, then. Makes you spit, doesn't it.
I have the same issue. Nobody invites my Mom for Christmas dinner, so the last two years I've cooked for her at her house. It's a pain, but I'd rather do it than feel guilty about my Mom spending the holiday with no company and no dinner. I agree with blue55 - as long as there is one sibling who will do it, the others feel that they can just turn a blind eye. It's very disappointing.
As an often lazy sibling myself, I want to remind people to use their words and ASK for the help they need. Some people who would never offer to help would be willing to do a specific job if asked. Of course, you know your own family, but don't expect people to read your mind.