My caregiver role has ended, but I want to share some interesting biochemical reactions that occur that enable our species to survive. I cribbed most of this information from a well done YouTube video from Simon Sinek called "The Chemistry of the Good Life" (only 9 minutes long). Take it or leave it according to your truths. It focuses on 5 chemicals, of them, 2 I feel are important to caregivers. Here they are:
Endorphin: The sole purpose of Endorphin is to mask physical pain. The effect doesn't last long.
Dopamine: This chemical helps us get things done. Make a daily written checklist of things you want to accomplish. You will get a hit of dopamine and feel good as you cross off each task on your list. The downside is it is highly addictive. It's released by alcohol, nicotine, gambling, cell phones, social media, and other destructive behaviors.
Serotonin: This is the chemical released when you get public recognition of an achievement and that feeling of pride and status. This is why we as social animals, have graduation ceremonies. Nice thing is not only does the graduate get the hit, but their parents do as well. You can fake it out however by outrageous consumerism to achieve status. After you buy that status item however, you may feel empty. We were meant to bond together, and when that bonding doesn't happen, it doesn't achieve it's intended purpose.
Oxytocin: This is the good one, the one you want as much as you can get. It's that good feeling you get when you love and feel loved. It's released by love, friendship, feeling like someone has your back. It's also released by close physical contact like hugging and kissing. Here's the best one, it's released when you do good deeds for others. When a mother gives birth, the mother gets flooded with Oxytocin so that she cares for her newborn. Farmers give it to cows when they have difficulties calving. Yes, all social animals release the exact same chemicals. It's the glue that binds us as a species together. It's a biological necessity for our survival. Happy people, and couples all live longer lives. Think about how when there is a natural disaster, total strangers help each other out. Oxytocin is doing it's job (oxi-toe-sin).
Cortisol: this is released when we are stressed or in danger. It is necessary for our survival, but it's only meant for short periods of time until the danger passes. It's the prelude to the fight or flight response. The heart rate goes up, paranoia sets in, glucose gets pumped to the muscles to be able to fight or run. Growth, the immune system, all get shut down. Don't need it in that moment. It also inhibits Oxytocin and Serotonin. This is what caregivers must be careful of, being stressed for too long does nobody any good. Our society has far too many enablers of cortisol release. Watch certain news channels with a critical eye and you see they are constantly pumping fear into us. The entire spectrum of political beliefs do it for ratings. Corporations do it too. Think about job layoffs to save a few dollars. Our only recourse we have to fight back is our love and caring for each other. Oxytocin can win if we let it. Being a 24/7 caregiver was the hardest thing I ever did in my life. I made many mistakes, you will make some too. At the end of this experience, I'm glad I did it, I hope it made me a better person for it. Whatever your beliefs are, I wish you all the best. Peace.
I had 5 babies and nursed them all for 2+ years. I remember distinctly being overhwelmed and when I got a little too cray-cray for DH to handle, he'd say (half joking) 'go nurse the baby, you'll feel better". And I did. I wish oxytocin was in a pill form, it was that calming.
Your article gives me a lot to think about. Having been under chronic, non ending stress for the last 25 years has left me 'empty' and although I am on antidepressants--it's not the same as just feeling good.
I do not watch the news and I refuse to talk politics with DH. That helps, some. Don't need to go looking for trouble, for sure.