She has run up over $20,000 in credit card debt to gamble. She spends over $1,000 a month cash from her meager income gambling. She is mad at me because when she was sick, I didn't pay her bills and ruined her credit. She has taken the bills back and is paying minimum payments on them. She won't admit she has a problem and is starting to bounce checks, etc. Do I need an attorney to take her bills away from her or what? Frustrated...she has called me everything in the book when I have tried to make her understand what she is doing...there is some dementia going on I think too.
Do you have power of attorney?
If she's still competent, going to an attorney won't help you. She'd have to be declared incompetent for you to be given guardianship.
She is free to make her own poor choices.
You are free to say "mom, you have an addiction. Let me help you get help for this."
Of course she is going to call you all the names she can think of that goes with the territory. Can you contact all he creators and request that they refuse any other transactions
Is she actually going to the casino or by phone or online.
You are not going to be able to talk her out of it, it is far too much fun.
My advice would be that once you have stopped her running up further debts you actually encourage her. Go with her to the casino but make sure she only has a small amount of money and leaves her cards at home.
$20 to ply the slots might be enough. Then if she wins give her another $20. Take any excess to go towards her debt. You might actually have fun yourself with your own $20.
My cleaning lady goes most weeks and limits herself but the whole family goes with her and they have lot of fun. They also accumulate lots of coupons for free food so every so often the whole family goes for a meal.
Whatever you do don't help her pay off her debts, they are not your responsibility
I play these, and they are Fun, but I NEVER put money into the online account, as there is no upside, and you do not ever Win Cash, just points, so it's like a Personal Best sort of thing.
If she truly has an addiction, it would probably be best to speak with the VFW folks and tell them she's going broke, but I'm not sure how they can stop her from playing.
Good luck with this most difficult problem!
PS, I thoroughly enjoy going to the real Casino, but I can afford itfor the most part. My Mom had a pretty strong love of gambling too, but not quite an addiction, but she would definitely get nasty at times, when I wouldn't go to the cash machine for her, behind my Dad's back, Lol! She really enjoyed it, and had six kids who would indulge her on gambling vacations, so mostly in good fun. Anything to make Mom happy in the end!
You can try to automate as many of your mother's bills as possible and have the amounts deducted from her checking account.