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This man has been a daily part of me and my 2 kids' lives for over 15 yrs and during that time his 2 boys have visited him a total if 5-6 times . This last year they started showing up every couple months , they have called us family since i could remember . Our boys even stay for a week at each others houses .


i know the oldest son has p.o.a over their dad medical since his wife( their mom) passed in 1989 . Dad also has a disability from an accident when he was 21 . He has had short term memort loss since the accident but has lived all these years alone .except a welfare check once a year from his kids . I met him in 2000 and his house was gonna ger foreclosed on and alot of debt fron a previous caregiver taking advantage of him .,


his kids didnt even care . I helped him with his financial agent get his house paid offagain and he has been debt free for most of the time ive known him. .


I have told his kids everything i was doing wen i did it . They never had a problem. Which is why this next part is so confusing. I said they started coming up more frequent this past year. Well with out talking to him ,or asking him ...they took him one morning back to live w the youngest boy . I havent seen him since . Ive called to find out wat happened and why and no answer and blocked on fbook and messenger..


they never told anyone they took him , plus they put lock bars on all the windows and doors . When i did get some one to speak to me one time she said it was a spontanios thing they didnt plan to take him . So i guess they always carry a new deadbolt and 12 lockbars in their trunk all the time ..


All that being said finally i got to speak to him but she told him wat to say. Then i got a civil standby just to go say hi since i didnt get to and they refused to let me see him and are telling everybody that he has dementia which he does not. . They may have poa but hes still competent abd they no right to isolate him from friends and family . I also dont believe any of wat they did was in his best interest.. I kmow for a fact he does not want to be there liveing with his son. Id bet my life on it.


Its been since dec. 2 2018 since ive seen him and i really miss him .hes my best friend. How can i get to see him and let him know wat his options are. He can leave if he wants but his kids wont tell him that and wont let me....btw they have been to neworleans at mardigras and vegas a couple of time since . Wen they took him they also got the 5000$ insurance check for car that was in both our names ,his 2000$ in saviings and his 3800$ a month income and his son quit his job .


please i dont know what else to do except go sit on the front lawn until he comes out to smoke a cig or get the cops called on me. But he has a right to see friends .i just want to bring home to where he wants to be so he can have quality of life . What can i do .?

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If they took a check with your name on it and forged your signature that is fraud. I would call the insurance company who issued it and tell them this.

If you feel this is Adult abuse, call APS and have them investigate. If he gets SS, son has to show that its being used on his father.
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Sassafrass3 Apr 2019
I don't know if the check has my name on it but the car did. And I've read up on poa and he is still competent so they can't tell him he has to live there he makes enough money to afford in home care if he chooses. That why they wont let me see him becAuse they know he does not want to be there and he could choose that he would rather live In his second house. Where they took him from . I know for a fact he does not want to be there. They did not hAve his best Interesr in mind. Or they wouldn't have taken hi. That way. And what's wrong w a conversation. With either one of us . They isolated him from everybody
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Look at this from the other side. I suspect his children may have been suspicious of the much younger woman with young kids. Perhaps they thought you were up to no good? I’m not implying that you were or are. I’m asking you to consider that they have started to question your motives.

unfortunately his kids have rights whereas you do not. You can report your suspicions but his kids have POA and you won’t get very far with anyone. I am curious why you say they got his money? They didn’t exactly get it. His money is his money. It goes where he goes. His savings and his monthly income=his. It sounds like you may feel entitled to some of it? And as far as his son quitting his job, perhaps his dad needs more care than you realized? Who was taking care of him when he was with you? Now that you are out of the picture, someone has to take care of him right?
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Sassafrass3 Apr 2019
For one he never gets to get of the house so how could he spend his money . And no I don't feel entitled to it . The fact that he didn't get a choice And he still has that choice. . and the way they took him was wrong. I've been there thru Dr. Visits, surgery, catheter for over a year and where were they then. Plus they refuse to let me see him period. I ve always taken their side but this was wrong. They weren't doing this in his best interest. And they could have come to me and talked about this. .
As for the kids why all of a sudden interest in him wen for years they left him here w nobody.
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Sassafrass, when someone is caring for a person every single day, they don't notice changes in health quite like a person who visits only occasionally. It could be the grown children of this man were able to see the forest for the trees, and decided that caring of Dad is now their responsibly.

I can fully understand why after all these years of your helping and caring, you are curious on how he is doing. You mentioned that this gentleman never gets out of the house, thus it sounds like you are going by the house on a regular basis. Be careful, you don't want to give the appearance of stalking.

You are correct, the family should have talk with you regarding what their plans were for their Dad. Lack of communication can be quite common, especially if the new caregivers are his sons, they may or may not understand the emotional side of this situation.
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What happened to the car that the insurers paid out $5K for?

How old are your kids? What do they think of what's been happening?
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