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I totally understand first of all what your feeling and thinking. I spent most of the summer and two weeks straight 24/7 caring for an Aunt, my Dad's sister. She had no children. She thought she could do things on her own but if left alone more than 2 hours she would call either me or push her life alert button, because she was anxious or was wet. It came down to my wellbeing or her comfort in her own home. I was away from my home, husband, dogs, including a puppy the majority of the time. Despite restrictions due to COVID I had to put her in a home. My sister and I were both DPOAs and my Aunt's sister is in no physical shape to care for her. We worked hard to get her on Medicaid. They only paid me 6 hours a day for care. I lost my life trying to give her a better one. I couldn't do it anymore. You have to take care of yourself first. Do you have a life? What responsibility will your sister have for all the care and housing your Mom requires? Who controls finances and medical decisions? I wouldn't feel bad putting her in a facility during Covid. If your sister insists on taking over everything then let her try. I doubt she'll manage long at all. It's extremely difficult. I am even a senior caregiver for a living and my aunt was more difficult than any of my clients were and I didn't even get paid 18 of 24 hours each day. Do what your heart says and work with your husband on what's best for you and your life and wellbeing. Best wishes.
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