She is 89 and in a wheelchair with a spinal cord injury. She has severe balance issues and wears a gait belt for transfers. I can get her on the toilet, but she can't get her thighs apart enough to wipe herself. She's afraid she'll fall and I am too if she leans too far forward. We have grab bars but again balance is a problem. I've looked at toileting aids and they all seem designed for people who don't have this issue. She is in an apartment so we can't install anything new. Has anyone else had this problem?
I had to do that with my husband who was completely bedridden. I had to hire an aide to come in the mornings to put him on the bedside commode, so he could poop. When he was done she would hold him up with a gait belt, and I would clean him up. That worked quite well. Now my husband had a supra pubic catheter, so I didn't have to worry about cleaning him after he peed, only after he pooped.
I wish you the best as you get things figured out. You certainly don't want her getting a UTI because she's not cleaned properly.
*Preferably a shower commode - not only waterproof, but also usually more comfortable for the person and more easily manoeuvrable for you; + their buckets hold a good couple of gallons of water.
** With its seat up.