He had been diagnosed with cancer 7 months earlier, had surgery to remove the cancer and came home. By the end of July he was showing signs again. He refused to see his doctor and by the end of August he was admitted for another surgery. Keep in mind he was 89 years old and had been in declining health for 18 months. We didn’t have stairs. Any advice is appreciated
I am afraid, because you're new here and have no filled in a profile nor given us much of a history her, we are as lost as you are.
You were ACCUSED BY WHOM?
Did your husband say you pushed him down stairs?
Did you get reported by husband?
Did you get reported by medical personnel?
You say that APS showed up at your door.
Is your husband competent or is he suffering from confusion and dementia.
If you have no stairs exactly which stairs is APS speaking of?
As you can imagine, your brief note without much information has simply brought more questions.
I would be open and honest with APS.
That's the best you can do.
What kind of advice are you seeking? Hopefully you've called an attorney for guidance.
Good luck.
It would go over to APS first to be investigated then they decide of it goes to the police for further action.
I would wait to see what their report says, if it gets turned over as a criminal investigation. Then you will need a lawyer.
Medical staff are mandated reporters. Even if they suspected he was telling a tale they are still obligated to report it.
More info would help us help you better.
So, what exactly is APS after?
I've dealt with APS twice before. It is more of a nuisance than anything else with people poking around your home and just being nosy due to false accusations. Did he have any broken bones or injuries because of the fall?
So, they are still being an annoyance after you husband's demise. If it was your husband who made these accusations and refused to see his doctor until his second hospitalization, makes me wonder why APS was called in.
Get a lawyer.
Cooperate with APS.
This is what you tell nosey APS people if they want to come into your house just to look around or talk.
Get a warrant.
Then you call a lawyer.
You don't have to let anyone in your home without a court-order. It's a disgrace the cases APS gets all hot under the collar about. Cases where there is no abuse going on. Then others where a person is being seriously abused they just blow off. You don't have to take their crap of intimidation.
I am quite amazed that your experience with APS was so bad. Mine as a mandated reporter/RN was the opposite both in terms of APS and CPS (child protective). As was their coordination with our social workers. I must have just lucked out in a good system.
Well, APS saw you did not have stairs. They have to investigate any claim received. Now you wait for a report. If your accused, then you get that lawyer.
Please come back and tell us what happens.
And this whole thing of being accused of pushing someone down stairs that don't exist doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I also agree with the observations of Lea that this would ordinarily be a police case.
APS has a difficult job. As a mandated reporter (paramedic), I have called for APS to follow up for a number of patients who were being neglected or who were harming themselves or others. It happens...a lot. In this case, the moment they see that there are no stairs then it should be clear that the allegations were false.
What APS will often do in a situation like this is help connect families with resources or help the family find a better living situation for their loved ones. When I go into a hoarding situation, for example, and report the situation to APS in our county, I usually end up working with APS to make the home safer. One recent patient, whose house had to be condemned as unlivable, was housed by APS and is now much healthier (and happier).
It's better that we investigate allegations than let our elderly suffer abuse or neglect.
And am SOOO glad to see a paramedic on this page. I hope against hope you stick around, check in here a few times a week, a help others with your knowledge. We for instance have a woman writing us today about constipation, and I just now after a few days of her communication learn that her elder has a huge bloated abdomen. I referred her to EMS and transport to hospital so this lady can be examined to r/o bowel obstruction.
You could save lives here with the right questions, and welcome to the forum.