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My mom is 71 . She still independent on the aspect she still drives to the store, Dr's ect. But she has fallen several times in her home . She cant take care of basic needs, laundry, dishes, taking trash out. Cleaning. She's a hoarder and we have tried and tried to get the place clean but it goes right back. She has said she would like to try an assisted living place but they are expensive. She does not want to lose any driving privileges at all. Not sure where to even start!

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if your is on Medicare/Medical you can start the process for an Assisted Living Waiver. It does take a while, still waiting on my moms approval for three months, but if approved S.S. will bump up her money so she can be in a assisted living facility. Just realize if you go this route most of her $ will go to the facility. Mom get $990 from S.S. now, so when they bump her up she will only get about $120 in her account. The rest goes to the facility for her care.
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Jenn1049, if mom is the widow of a wartime veteran, she may be eligible for VA Aid and Attendance, up to $1100 a month for the level of care portion.
If she has a house, consider renting it for income to assisted living.
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Her mobility has went down quite a bit in the past 3 years she has had several falls, extreme weakness on her left side but no one including MD's has said anything about previous stroke. She has went to therapy for her weakness but it hasn't seem to help improve anything. She cant stand for very long and I do know some of her house keeping issues are because she has gotten lazy. I love my mom and hate to say it but I think she has mental issues going on because of the hoarding issues that have become unsafe. She went to look at an assisted living facility a couple weeks ago and it is expensive... after her discount she's looking at $1300 a month and she doesn't get that in SS. So we continue to look.
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Some facilities offer a one month no strings attached trial period, possibly at half price. Would she be willing to try it? PS she should not be driving at this point, ask her MD what he thinks.
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Jenn, gosh your Mom is near my age so I am very surprised that she needs help. What are her medical issues besides mobility? If she is able to drive to the store, she should be able to do simple things around the house. Washing dishes and doing the laundry is a lot easier then driving. As for falling, heavens I have even fallen myself and broke my shoulder, I still work and was taking care of my own parents who were in their 90's until they had recently passed.

Maybe it is time that you start to limit what things you are doing for her, as I hate to say this, but it sounds like she is being spoiled. Then look around for senior apartments, the rents are geared toward one's income. She would be living with people near her age. She could create some new friendships where they help each other :)
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