She did have trouble signing checks. So she ask me to please sign her checks and I only used her money for her bill.. Now I am paying her bills myself, which I don't mind. She has great insurance. I make all her appt. w/doctors and my brother and sister-n-law kicked her out in the middle of the night over a tract of land which my mother bought and she gave my brother 1/2 undivided interest and me too. I am her POA now and she wants my brother out of her will. My brother as a criminal record as do I. They are both very old. I am a professional woman and my brother is disabled and has a wife whom is (according) to her doctors as a mental patient and my brother has a mental Impairment. What can I do now? I need to protect my mother and she does not ever want to see them or talk to them every. She took them out of her will against my wishes. But she cannot get over the fact they kicked her out!! I don't have guardianship, I only have POA.
Now when the time comes to sell the land/house, both you and your brother's capital gains tax on the property will be whatever price your parents had paid for land/house when they bought it.... if said property had been Willed to both of you, the capital gains basis would be the market value of the land/house at on the date of death.
If only you could turn back time and your parents had done things differently... you need to march forward. Ask your Mom if she still has the paperwork of when she and your Dad had bought the property and what they had paid. If not, the county should have it in their records.
Curious why your brother and his wife feel that he should have all the land and the house? By the way, who has ownership of the house alone? Who now lives in that house? Did your Mom have "life estate"? Meaning even if she no longer owns her house, she can spend the rest of her life in that house. Once she moves out, the "life estate" ends, and the current owner can do whatever he/she pleases with the house.
My daughter agreed and Mother agreed and my lawyer wrote up the new POA for my Mom. I am my Mother's POA on medical as she lives with me and my husband. I take care of my Mother and don't want it any other way. MY brother certainly doesn't want to have anything to do with Mother. He has clearly shown that to be true.
After my brother kicked her out when she told him she had deeded the other half of the undivided interest of the land/house to me.
Mom has been in the ER 2x's in June and he didn't even care to see if she was ok or anything, no word at either time while she was in the hospital. He is very angry over him not getting my half. Mom told the attorney yesterday that she has two children and the land/house is to be split between the both of us. Mom does not own the small farm nor the home on it. This is the reason my brother is suing me. For the little bit of land and the house, which I gave my mom the money to pay it off in 1997 and Dad gave my brother his half right before he died. My half was to go to me when Mother passes. Mother wanted to change it to give it to me last year and she did. I told my brother she deeded my half to me and he didn't say a word. Then my brothers wife went ballistic about Mom giving me my half and had the lawyer to send the letter demanding me to re-deed it to Mom. I hope I am able to clear all the confusion up for you. This is sounding like a soap opera to me.
I do want to clear up the confusing part I have written so I could get help from people like you all. I am new to this (taking care of my Mother). I see some little things which I know are not Mom and it breaks my heart. I love her so much and sometimes I just cry because I see those little moments and ask myself, that's the disease, that's not Mom. I just wonder if they are going to come to stay and how long before I see my Mother doing things that are not my Mom. Do they become more often? Do they ever just stay one day and never leave?
As for the funeral, you can cross that bridge when the time comes. Again, reassure or redirect your Mom. Realistically, how would you keep them out if they showed up, hire a bouncer? It's not worth stressing over something that may never happen.
Is the land/house already deeded to your Mother, you, and your brother? Sounds that way. Or do you mean when your Mother passes on that you will get 1/2 of the land/house and your brother will get the other half of the land/house?
Your brother is suing for 100% of the land/house? Or suing for his share thinking the Will had been changed?
This is also confusing, in your original posting you wrote " I am her POA now", then you wrote your daughter is her grandmother's POA.
Yikes, I am stressed out just reading all this. Best to tell your Mom the attorney is working it all out, don't worry about it any more. Don't talk about it. Only time to bring it up is if the attorney needs more information that he needs from your Mom.
My brother is suing me for the 1/2 Mother gave me. I am paying all the bills for the land and the house on the land with my money. I hired a lawyer yesterday and he said this is a frivolous case and it will go on for a long time. The lawyer said my brother cannot win. I don't understand why he is doing this as it is upsetting my mom something terrible. The attorney took her deposition yesterday and said he doesn't know why my brother is saying she is mentally impaired. He didn't see it in her answers.
I just want my mother to be stress free and to live her life comfortable w/o the stress my brother is putting on her. I have accepted the fact something is not right with my brother and his wife.
I changed the POA to my daughter because of the trouble I had as a teenager. I am 66 now and only want the best for my mom as she worked 2 jobs and sometimes 3 to raise my brother and me. She became the Officer of a large banking institution and gave up so much to take care of her children. She is very selfless and amazing. My dad was an alcoholic and did not work much. My mom was the ROCK of our family.
What do I do about Mother not wanting my brother and his wife at her funeral or viewing? She made me promise to her that I would not let them come. I don't want to keep my brother from her funeral, when that time comes. Do I keep my promise or break it? I have to live with myself and I don't know what to do. Any advice on this. Some of my church members have said, she will be gone and won't know. I WILL KNOW.....
Last question:
How do I help my mom stay stress free?
In addition, you state that you are "her POA now"; were you holding that position when you signed her checks?
What is your question?