My mom had a cat scan, ( normal), blood work, (normal), urinalysis ( normal). She is not normal however, verbally abusive to my dad, accuses him cheating, poisoning her, moving things, etc. He tries overlook it. I want to get help, but does dad have to make the call? They live at their own home & are 76. She also thinks house is bugged & people follow them.
You need to get dad to see that there is help for her and it's not a loony bin or sedatives. He needs to get himself educated so he can help her.
If something like that won't work, can you investigate an involuntary psychiatric evaluation? You might go with your father to visit a geriatric to describe mom's symptoms. Dad probably needs antidepressants at this point, and it would probably do him good to get a professional opinion on HIS ability to cope with this ongoing abuse.
With a demented mom and a passive dad, it sounds as though you're going to have to be the grownup here!
Your mom has dementia. Her brain is broken (alternatively, she's got some kind of mental illness that is causing paranoia). You are not going to convict her of anything; she is apparently past the reasoning stage.
If your dad is her full time caregiver, HE'S the one to worry about, and to work on. One third of all caregivers die before the person they are caring for does. This is especially true of older spouses. He needs to see that the best way he can express his love right now is by getting her to a new doctor; whether it's a geriatrician, a neurologist who specializes in dementia or a geriatric psychiatrist, any of them will have better ideas than her GP. Just make sure you or dad slips the doctor a list of symptoms beforehand.
In any event, make dad the focus of the intervention, especially as regards the psychiatrist. It might make her want to go.
Also are you certain she's taking her current meds properly?
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