My brother who has dementia Parkinson’s and POA healthcare has the NH not letting the staff talk to her about her care. Written in chart.
I live in another state and will be flying up there. I am afraid they will not let me see her. Can he do that because he has the POA for healthcare. Sounds like abuse.
I would start with contecting your brother/the POA and would beg to see my parent. I would reassure brother that I understand he is the "lion at the gate" and that you would be more than happy to have all visits accompanied by him or by the administration.
If that doesn't work I would consult an attorney to ask if they can arrange for me to visit my parent in order to give them my love.
I might call APS and just run your circumstances by them. They may have some ideas for negotiation of a visit to your Mom.
It makes me so sad when siblings are at war over a still living parent. I so hope things will get better. It pains me that any elder has to go through this at the end of life.
I wish the best to you. I hope you will update us if you find a way to visit and give some love to your Mom.
I do know that family mediation is sometimes the answer for this. If you wish contact info on how to get mediation services, do drop me a line in private messages and I can give you some dot-org mediations outreach contacts. In the meantime, send short and loving cards and notes, flowers, candy, whatever you think your Mom might enjoy, and hope it gets through to her.
He can also determine who gets what information. Anyone that has not been listed on HIPAA forms as able to get information can not get any information. (Technically they probably can't even confirm she is a resident)
If your brother does have dementia he probably should not be the responsible party.
If your mom has dementia herself she can no longer assign or change POA.
You would have to go to court.
You would have to present proof that your brother is not fit, not cognizant to be POA and you would then have to obtain Guardianship. Or the Court would appoint a Guardian for your mom.
Not able to get info from some nurses and know she is taking it bud. Sister in law insists she takes it. She see’s her once every 2 weeks. My mother and her do not like each other.