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WOW! You have had so many changes to go through. If I can recommend anything it is to get enough rest and good nutrition. I cannot begin to imagine your stress level or feelings of loss. Very sorry to hear that your family has sustained such a heart aching loss so suddenly. We never know.
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Still muddling through all this myself with my mother n law...She has gone from being able to at least stand to transfer from her bed to wheel chair to being dead weight. It's like trying to move a 140 pound sack of potatoes without bruising any of them. The pull up depends are not working now, I have ordered the maximum diapers for her but am trying to figure out the easiest type of clothing to get off and on her. She likes the fleece pajamas I bought her but trying to get those up or down now is like a wrestling match. This has all happened in the last 4 days so we are doing catch up on how to take care of her in this new capacity. I bought the body wash and shampoo that does not have to be rinsed and am calling her doctor tomorrow to see what has to be done to get Medicare to pay for a hospital bed and probably a lift too. right now I have her in a fleece pullover shirt and a pull up diaper with one blanket behind her and one wrapped around her lap in a wheelchair...any suggestions that would make this easier would be appreciated.
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Reddog .. they make hospital gowns for a good reason: they're easy access, easy to put on and take off. We've gotten several nightgowns from a thrift store and simply cut it up the back and added ties (some we don't even go that far .. just cut a slit up the back, so it doesn't get wet, in case she's incontinent). If you don't want to have her in a nightie all day, get clothes several sizes bigger, as you don't have to fight immovable limbs in a tight shirt/pants.

Pull up briefs can still work, but it takes a lot of rolling and turning to get them on. Better yet, find the ones with velcro-like tabs (I personally prefer the 'fitted tabbed' versions, which I actually cut up the sides. The unfitted versions just don't FIT right and always bunch in the wrong places). I get almost all of ours at CVS, where the prices are actually cheaper than if I ordered them in bulk.

If you have access to getting home health to come and teach you techniques, DO it! All kinds of back-saving tricks, like keeping a pad under her, and use IT to help you with the turns (you grab the pad and pull/lift to make her turn/roll over). As for lifting and moving, see if you can find a 'gait belt' .. it wraps around the middle and gives you leverage for lifting/transferring. If you don't have access to Home Health instructions, there are a number of really good videos on YouTube.

Good luck and let us know how it goes for you.
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Thanks LadeeC...I talked to a friend of mine that had moved out of town that used to be a nurse and her mom use to run a convalescent hospital...she told me some of the same things you did. I had already thought about cutting her fleece tops up the back but she also suggested doing the same with the warm pajama bottoms...split from waist band to crotch, and can either tab them together in the back or leave it alone with a blanket in the wheel chair to cover her. I have used the gait belt to get her in and out of the shower for a long time but had not thought about using it to turn her? I have the folded transfer sheet under her when she's in bed with a water proof pad between that and the sheet...tried having it under her and she managed to shove it in the floor and still pee all over the bed...I use the maximum pullups but they just don't hold enough to get her through the night...the ones I ordered through a medical supply place are supposed to be the heaviest duty they make. Had already ordered her some larger tops...she didn't like that...still has enough vanity for about a dozen women...the ones she had were like trying to get a sausage out of its casing. I keep her in the heavy fleece pajamas in the winter and she still has a sweat jacket over them...she's still cold and I run around in a sleeveless top sweating because the house is so warm. I'm calling her doctor tomorrow to see if we can get a hospital bed for her that Medicare will pay for. That would make everything easier...just having her in a twin bed would be easier. I will also take your suggestion and see if we can get some kind of visiting nurse to show me the tricks of the trade. Thanks again...there has to be a way to make this work for all of us...at least she is good natured about the whole thing, that is a blessing that I am well aware of. This morning she was kind of giggling while I was rolling her around trying to get her dressed. Some days she remembers things and sometimes she wants to know where her room is?
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CJA-
I am so sorry for your loss. And it is wonderful that you and your sisters were able to work together! Your mom must have been so proud of her girls!
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CJA ... condolences on your loss, and congratulations on your 'soft' transition .. it sounds as if you and your sisters are joining together and making it a family affair. I wish you gentleness and as much serenity as you can find, as you move through the next phases. Blessings.

Reddog .. you may want to add incontinence pads to the nighttime diaper. The major thing to remember and consider: when she's wet, especially overnight (and if she's losing sensation that she IS wet), the risk of bedsores increase. There are many ways to alleviate this risk including frequent turnings/position shifts, more frequent changes of the diaper, liquid/creme barriers and adding a variable pressure air mattress to the bed (our personal lifesaver .. Edna doesn't *move*, at all, at night, so the mattress allows us to sleep at night, knowing she's never quite in the same position). And, yeah .. some days are great and others make you feel like you're dealing with a completely different person. Edna vacillates from knowing where she is to wanting to go home .. while she's sitting in the living room of the home she's had for 30 years. Dementia is a devil.

Hang in there, and let us know how it goes!
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So sorry for your loss. God will give you strength to get through it all. Hugs!
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