Does anyone else get so burnt out that they feel suicidal at times? I have been caregiving for my disabled mother for 10 years and my brother and sister do not help. I feel that sometimes suicide is a good option, but I know it would destroy my mother. I would never do that to her, but I sure feel like I want to. I see a Psychiatrist and they know..... the only help they have offered is counseling (which is only offered once per month at kaiser), and anti-depressants, and xanex. Although these things help, the core issue is that I am very disappointed by my brother and sister. They are the cold-hearted terribly self centered people, and I cannot understand how they could treat their sweet disabled mother this way. I also can't understand how they could let me be the primary caregiver (essentially I am forced to do this because they will not). I have even told them how emotionally fragile I am, and they DON'T CARE! I really hope that god understands how much I love my mother, and he has a reason for making my brother and sister such terrible people. I don't understand his plan.
You are caring for your parents. Do you get paid for your services? If not, I think it is time for you to check into how you can get paid. It just is not right for you to give up the "major" earnings years of your life and end up with no way to take care of yourself. That is even more true in your situation where you could end up homeless. Also, you say your father told y'all this. Is there a will? If not, what he says will not hold much water. State law will prevail. If there is no will, I'd keep quiet about it and when the time comes, let the state determine who gets what.
My sister and I have decided that if we end up alone we are going to each get a camper (1 camper would be too much togetherness) and travel together. We were discussing it & my mother said, "I want to go too." She never liked camping so this is really funny. We have decided we can take her, check her into hotels along the way & have somewhere to go to get a shower in a full size tub. Lemonade out of lemons!
Please do something to ensure you have a comfortable future. You have already given up a lot. talk to you later.